I think everyone probably does this to a degree or at least has done it, but continuously is obviously extremely destructive. It can be exhausting also being around a constantly pessimistic person. I used to dwell on things for a long time, but I was able to shift away from that and thus became far more positive. Pain can be a fantastic motivator (if you use it as such) but continuous self-defeat is harmful should be dealt with! Great post - I’ll be looking in on here more often (I’m new to Steemit)
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My ex was studying psychology and working with patients at the time we were together. His method to deal with pessimism was to "ignore inappropriate behavior." So when the person keeps talking about how bad things are, you continually ask them things like, "What can you do to improve this?" Or "How can you avoid this in the future?" Any question related to personal responsibility and action will help.
So that was many years ago, and I have used this trick a lot. I am never depressed and always see the bright side and better days coming. But I agree with you that being around naysayers is hard. When I start asking them these questions, they either improve or won't come near me at all :)