I am the same way. I often think some of it is an age thing. I have noticed many younger people feel entitled/owed without offering work in exchange for their rewards. I imagine many who complain don't invest their own money, and spend plenty of time elsewhere online posting with zero compensation, yet strangely enough think they should be worth a lot of money here.
I am thankful for every vote, thankful for every person who responds to me, especially if it is a gesture of appreciation for something I have said.
As for the self voters, I don't get that anger either. It's their stake. At what point does one have a large enough stake others can act like it is theirs to dictate how one uses it? I was running around 5-10% self voting before my two week absence, but not because I am some saint. I feel it is crucial to build my circle and my strategy is votes where I feel they are justified (and still ran out of votes to quick).
Part of me hopes that some of the complainers will do well, so that they can see what it feels like to have a bunch of people come in and tell you what you should do with your OWN assets. It is so annoying. :)