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One of the most arguably influential skills of a great leader and people person is the skill in dealing with people. Mastering this skill makes communicating fluent, anxiety-free, and you become a more likable person. Anybody can learn to master the skill of people but only if you're open to learn and practice 5 minutes every day.
So let's jump right into it!
What's the secret to talking to people?
Have you ever been to a family Christmas or Thanksgiving dinner where your relatives all ask you the same personal questions about what you're doing with your life? I'm sure you have. It seems like it's non-escaping and never-ending every year.
But the secret lies within this annual occurrence and that is to ask questions. Yes, it's that simple. But not everybody does it! As humans, we are naturally inclined to talk about ourselves. So to effectively communicate with others and become more likable and influential, it's important to ask questions, often. Ask everyone you see about their day, what they do, or if they have a family. Gradually over time, you will develop skills to ask deeper, meaningful questions to really get to know people and have an influence on them.
Think about it this way, who was the last person you laid out your entire dream too. Now is that person someone you like being around? Maybe it's a significant other or an old friend who you miss. My point being is that deep questions establish connectivity between people. It establishes influence. Influence is a must-have quality of leader or business manager.
How to build influence and ask more questions?
To put this into effect we must first practice asking questions. The best way to do this is to look yourself in the mirror every morning and ask questions and respond to them every day, then gradually you will begin talking to people this way. After you do this for a while you can ask yourself deep questions in the mirror. This will not only help you ask these questions of other people but you will probably learn something about yourself you may not have known before based on your own answers.
Every day for 5 minutes ask yourself questions and answer them genuinely. Next, go out about your day and try to talk to everyone you see and ask them those questions followed by follow-up questions. You will be amazed by the answers you get and the people you meet. Some may even lead to friendships and you never know who's gonna have your back down the road!
If you'd like for me to dive deeper into detail, provide feedback for me in the comments below.
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Thanks for reading and enjoy your new skill!
Isaac