There are some absolute truths that we all learn on the job. Sometimes those things make sense in no other context, but every Nurse, CNA, PCT, healthcare aid of any kind, and others who may be fortunate or unfortunate to work in this field will come to know one undeniable truth. The truth of poop and gravity: in this case, gravity never wins.
The only thing that can defy gravity is poop.
After joining the medical field, these truths will be become self-evident: when a patient is laying in the bed regardless of their position, poop, that will invariably happen, is somehow able to resist the pull of gravity and rather than running downhill or pooling underneath the patient it will travel upward between their legs, covering every inch of the genetalia, groin, and anterior pelvis.
So, what now, you ask? As a healthcare provider you find a pleasant coworker by using the words “Hey, come help me clean some poop.” Then you pray they answer in some form of “I thought you’d never ask.”
Now is the dangerous part. Taking time to wipe some poop off the genetalia and anterior pelvis is recommended, but not too much time because invariably more poop will get there before you are done. So, you are ready to turn this patient over to wipe the parts where poop should go according to the laws of gravity, and if you are smart this is when you are on your guard. Once you turn a patient over, you are in to target zone for flying poop. Any healthcare provider worth their salt has learned this by now. If you put the bedrail down, you risk any clean sheets you may still have. If you leave the bedrail up as a shield, the patient will invariably shoot over it right at you. Enter the front lines of battle and contain the poop, clean the buttock cheeks and return to clean every nook, cranny, and crease, then reposition the patient.
Once the poop is contained you are invariably out of washcloths. Time to reload before the poopocpalypse begins again. Good Luck my friends.
Haha: firstly - there is Never any clean sheets left over. If you're having a 'code brown' then everything will need a change!! Also, the best way to con others in is mutual job swap and pretend ignorance (she did no 2's - sorry 🤤) There is pure nursing empathy coming to you from Australia...
Glad we can share in these experiences even across oceans. this really is universal truth.