Hi Steemians,
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Types of Family
A Filipino family really stands the definition of it being the basic unit of society. A typical family normally just have the parents and the kids. This is what we call as a nuclear family. In the Philippines, it isn't the case. Most "homes" here are of the extended family type. Aside from the parents and kids, you would see the aunt/uncle and their respective families as well. This is also not to mention the grandparents, cousins and the list can go on. They all are under one roof and share the same resources most commonly from just one source of income.
We really value close family ties. Unfortunately, it can be either rewarding or demeaning. There are some that helps one another to increase their status of living. However; there are families though that has this virtue as their major downfall.
Example?
A typical scenario is that the eldest, becomes the breadwinner, stopped school to work and finds a job. This is because the parents cannot supplement the daily needs of the family. So that the other siblings won't stop schooling, the eldest made the "SACRIFICE."
Fast forward, the other siblings finished their education, obtained their degrees and landed good jobs. Unfortunately, they also had families of their own to support. The eldest then, struggled to raise his status of living because he has no degree. Sad, isn't it?
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I know how much we value close family ties but there should be a limit to this. You, as a human being must be treated as one. Using the idea of being a family member to take advantage on you is never a good thing. When it is not healthy anymore, you should cut the tie and move on.
Cutting ties with a family member is very difficult. When you do that, society would judge you as some sort of a psycho or a maniac that has no heart. It is a hard decision to make, one of the hardest really but we should not condition ourselves that doing that is morally or ethically wrong.
If it is already too toxic for your life, do it. Please remember the fable of the boiling frog. The frog has the capability to adjust to gradually increasing heat. When placed in a tap water subject to fire, the frog will just stand and use its energy to acclimatize. Unfortunately, more and more energy is being used up that when it can't stand the heat, it dies being cooked in the heat.
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Moral lesson? Don't be that frog, jump out of the hot waters while you can.
When to sever family ties?
There are cases as well that a family member becomes the source of abuse - may it be emotionally, mentally or physically.
There are also family members that just stay because of the need to borrow money. It is a vicious hamster wheel. They become dependent in this.
When the relationship with the family creates too much stress and that family members are always negative on you. If certain family members just always look down on you or see you as some kind of a burden.
When the relationship is seemingly one-sided. When it is just all about that certain family member.
YOUR THOUGHTS?
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