I've been thinking about this increasingly for months; I appreciate your posting.
Like so many, many others, I'm navigating this with family, in particular, and others on the internet. It's easy to keep people at arm's length and ignore them or give only the most peripheral responses to beliefs they hold which I don't necessarily agree with, in order to sidestep an argument and "keep the peace."
But not engaging is not helpful to anyone, in the long run. The answer is to explore and to seek learning and growth, for everyone involved. To explore and challenge our own ideas and beliefs as well as those of others. To examine a concept, a belief, a practice, a policy, a whatever; to hold it in your mind and turn it over slowly, seeing its various facets, to weigh its strengths and weaknesses, it's potential consequences, is a sign - in my opinion - of less fearful, higher level thinking.
To be a truly independent thinker takes practice at being open to the perspectives of others, being willing to be wrong, willing to stand one's ground, and willing to let others hold to beliefs that differ from our own. It takes being willing to be accused of "both side-ism," fence-sitting (intellectual, philosophical, and moral)*, and sometimes far worse.
We don't live in a vacuum. Our decisions and interactions with others have consequences. Perhaps that's where fear comes into play, especially when it comes to our dealings with people we care about, or with those who have some measure of influence over how we're perceived by others. I know some people who've felt a lifetime of being attacked for their views; they are less inclined to engage others.
There's an old Jazz number, 'Tain't What You Do (It's the Way That You Do It), that in a funny way guides me in approaching others. I really do try to meet people half way, show them I try to understand where their coming from and why, try to see the possibility of truth or usefulness in what they're saying, before trying to show them the path to my "side" of the scenery.
Sometimes, it even works! :-) Seriously, I think I learned this subconsciously, being a customer-facing employee in every professional role I've had.
It's all to easy to be rigid, to avoid nuance, to see the universe in black and white. It is with those who are rigid, have no time for nuance, are subject to a black-and-white worldview that I am still learning how to navigate. Sometimes people will meet you halfway, and then there are the other what...70%, 80%, 90%? [side thought: is your estimate a measure of how jaded you are?]
Humans can't grow alone. We don't improve without bumping into the minds of others in community. There are so many more dimensions than "left" or "right," so many more realms than the political, health, or economic. So much about which we need to talk with, learn from, and teach each other.
I've never heard of Spiral Dynamics Integral, but I'll give it a look. Perhaps it will be useful. Perhaps it won't be my cup of tea. I expect at the least to learn something, and I'm looking forward to it.
*And while we're at this: may the Oxford comma never die. So there!! :-)
Thanks for chiming in, Clark!