Welcome back to Hive @richardjohn! Losing someone dear to you is not an easy journey and so it was right of you to take some time off. It has been a crazy ride since last year, right? We have all our struggles to deal with and our own coping mechanism.
I hope being here again would help you with your mental and emotional struggles bit by bit.
thank you clara, this means a lot! i really appreciate your support, glad to have found a friend as you :)