artifact

in #poet7 months ago

We bought a little robot

To help us clean the floor.

It wasn't real expensive,

We could have spent much more,

But all the bells and whistles,

Self-dumping and the like,

Seemed frivilous and wasteful,

So we bought this little tyke.

We named our robot "Biscuit"

Because it seemed to fit,

But since I've got to know it,

I call it "Little Sh*t."

It beeps and plays a little tune

When it begins to suck.

It even speaks some funny lines,

Like, "Help! My brush is stuck!"

It knows its way around the house,

And wipes from door to door,

By dragging anything behind

You left upon the floor.

It interrupts my writing

By bludgeoning my feet

Until I back out from the desk,

Acknowledging defeat.

When Biscuit hits a threshold,

Because the floors aren't level,

It bumps and spins and whirls, as if

Possessed by Robot Devil.

When all the rooms have been attacked,

It finds its way home soon

And parks its happy little butt

And plays a happy tune.

And when the little sh*t is done,

Everything's dust free

Until I empty out its tray,

And then, the dust's on me.

But Biscuit is a toddler,

Whom we hope one day will grow,

Into a real, live robot

We'll all be proud to know.

Meanwhile, my friends and neighbors,

Please heed my warning well,

If you buy the cheaper model,

Prepare for AI hell!