Turned Tables
In front of me.
She stands.
In a floral dress.
Delicate petals.
On wrinkled skin.
Her joints withering.
Time was unkind.
So was she.
I still remember.
Her words.
Her fist.
She is a predator.
The hunter.
Shot me down.
A fallen angel.
Inner voices.
Conflicted.
Alarmed.
Run away.
Fight back.
Never mind.
I was helpless then.
She is helpless now.
The others see.
A permanent scar.
Limping soul.
Crooked smile.
In their eyes.
I am cursed.
In mine.
I am a survivor.
Invincible.
Poetry by Jeremy Mifsud
Photo by Quentin Lagache on Unsplash
I really like this one. That stanza of single-word lines is great. I generally try to follow grammar rules in my poetry, but I really ought to break them, like you did here, since it can have such a powerful effect.
I found it so uncomfortable and strange to write in such a way. I understand you completely, as I tend to follow the grammatical rules (and if I break them, it tends to be unintentional). Sometimes breaking them does help the poem, but it might feel unnatural to do so. I'm glad you enjoyed it :3
I agree with whoshim. The single line format with full stops at the end of each line works really well. It makes the poem more immediate and punchy. Each line is like its own statement but you can also read each verse as a whole. This technique works better in some verses than others
but never the less the consistency of the punctuation as a technique to highlight is interesting and would be less effective and less obvious if it were only used in parts.
Great poem Jeremy :-)
Thank you! I appreciate the comment and it got me thinking. I tend to keep to grammatical rules, and when I break them, it seems like a create a new rule. It would be interesting for me to use different rules in different stanzas in some future pieces.
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