Hello Erika :D How have you been?
Thank you for taking the time to bring further clarity to this discussion! I truly appreciate it.
Do you think I should have worded like this, instead?
It is about not letting it [anger]risesurface in first place.
Big hug from Portugal :*
Yes, thank you! That's what I meant.
I come from that notion if anger is already being felt, than you cannot avoid it to rise to the surface. It's already there. If anger would be a full number of 10 and you see (feel) it coming, than the thing you can do is not letting it become a 10. You start to practice to leave it at a 6,5,4,3,2 ... in this process it'll be transformed.
There is no person in the world who can avoid experiencing anger, only rare people who skillfully can make it into a play for their advantage (or better: well being). Even the Buddhists or high educated monks tell that they as well feel the emotions all others do. But deal differently with them. Maybe Buddha or Jesus were special and some other role models we can think of through history and narratives.
A practitioner with long term practice may let go of the anger to zero (transform it). A not so skilled practitioner maybe manages it to stay around a 3.
Most of us are probably beginners, I include myself :) I guess, my number changes depending on with whom I get in touch.
If Mary after your encounter would have the experience that you were of assistance to her, this might be a very high state of dealing with anger. If she does not feel that way, I'd say that it doesn't harm and maybe sub-consciously she might change if she makes continuous positive experiences with her customers over time. It sounds mean somehow but we can thank the Mary's as they serve excellent opportunities for practice. LOL :-D
I am fine, thank you. Just experienced anger with my son. HaHa! Daily arguments about daily stuff.
How about you?
Hug you back!! <3
Erika
Edited! :D
I am also fine. Thank you :*
Oh! There you go we can thank the Marys, the sons, the relatives ... :)