ok ... how about ... i'll go out on a thin limb here and possibly fall off but ... let me ask you a question.
Do you know your own set of rules for life? Do you know why you want to follow your own set of rules?
When you are on a journey, such as life, it is much easier to find the right path when you have chosen a good map. And it is easier to follow the path when you know how to stay on the path because the map includes terrain lines. And because the map includes the terrain markings, you can choose how you prepare for the path.
So, you need to choose rules that act as a map, rules that help you prepare for the path, rules that help you choose left, right, up or down.
Your friends (or the majority) are following some rules of some sort. I suspect the rules change every day. I suspect they benefit some more than others.
I suggest you choose your own rules from sources that don't change with the latest trending social terms.
If I'm completely wrong, my apologies.
I'm also in #steemitbloggers and you can DM me via Discord.