That's what I meant to say. .. Lol That's added so much more to my information banks. Thank you.
I raised a "Lilly" with the exception I would never admit defeat even though often I was defeated. My "lilly" started life as a screamer who added headbanging and kicking/ biting/ spitting etc and was very demanding and that was with everyone not just with me. We forget that our reasonable explanation may not be reasonable to a toddler. Especially when these little bundles of dynamite only come with a guidelines sheet not a comprehensive user manual. One thing I aim to look at though, is there any correlation between the innate bad/ aggressive toddler behaviour and creativity/ stimulus. Is it only "busy" babies that have the devil tantrum?
You've included a lot of valuable reading and make a very good point about praising good behaviour and ignoring/ chastising bad. A very good and informative read. And double thank you for the inclusion :) I want to add that my "lilly" grew out of it by four and is still always looking to be busy. :)
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Oh dear @suzanrs ! How wonderful to see you here 😊 I am so glad to hear you found this post informative :)
You raised a Lilly, then ... it sounds like she was a handful! It is great to hear she became calmer and is still a busy individual! That is in great part because her mum was determined enough to 'not be defeated'. ;)
The point you made about what seems reasonable to us is not necessarily reasonable to a small child is very relevant indeed! Thanks for bringing this observation to this discussion.
You further research sounds an interesting one One thing I aim to look at though, is there any correlation between the innate bad/ aggressive toddler behaviour and creativity/ stimulus. Is it only "busy" babies that have the devil tantrum? I certainly look forward to that one!
I remember, quite a while ago, I came across a study about babies who get bored quicker then others. If I recall correctly, the suggestion was that, cognitively, they developed faster, but also were more irritable than the other babies (controls). I don't remember if they were more aggressive, though. But this was also something that normalized at the age of 4-5.
I just wanted to tell you that you are doing a beautiful job with your psychology posts! It is an honor to have you participating in my feed.
I wish you all the best :)
Oh yes, I raised a Lilly LOL. In fact the screaming headbanger youtube clip in my post wasn't unlike my "Lilly"... haha. And I wouldn't say she was calmer even now - just more able as an adult to focus I guess.
Interesting point about babies getting bored quicker - that definitely proved to be one of her issues. In fact up to 5 months of age Lilly screamed for so long so often that the GP and health visitor had her tested for all sorts. Once the mood took her there was nothing that would stop her for more than a few minutes, yet she slept well, fed/ate well, so obviously wasn't ill or in pain. THEN, she learned how to crawl - to get to things under her own steam. That was a game changer. The tantrums didn't stop but the difference was very noticable. Basically, she was a bored but determined headstrong little baby who wanted to do things her way before she realised what her way was! To say that Lilly hit milestomes early is an understatement too. Anything cognitive was reached and surpassed weeks, even months before the average. 15 months for her first 2 - 4 word sentences! And even in adulthood nothing holds her attention for long and yet my Lilly is very creative and (when she wants to be) capable of some great work. Second child was like chalk to cheese. :D
And thank you for your support - I look forward to reading you work regularly now. :)
Oh my sweet Jesus 😅 It would be great to have a psychology post on what mothers in such situations resort to in order to keep going! What do you think? Please accept this trophy 🏆 for surviving her childhood and having managed to help her to become a creative, capable adult! 😊
Ha - one day I may write about it - but it wasn't all bad. In fact she developed a great sense of humour from an early age and who can't love the moments when they surprise themselves as well as us parents. It's sometimes hard to see the light on the darker days but no one said it would be easy, just worth it :D
thanks for the trophy 😊 I deserve it LOL.
Ohhhh 😍