money. Money is problematic enough when you're single and alone and trying to make rent and eat dinner and have the most fabulous dress at the party or the newest gadget to play with on the subway, but throw another person into the equation and things start to get dicey. Money, despite what any of us wants to believe about "love conquering all", really matters when you're in a relationship. I'm not just talking about letting someone pay for dinner on a date; We all know that even though we're empowered feminists, it's nice to be treated to a nice night out by someone else from time-to-time, and also, you're kidding yourself if you think that's the extent of how money will factor into your relationship. Love might, indeed, conquer all, but love still needs a roof over its head, and probably also doesn't want to have awkward conversations about financing a romantic getaway.Money matters because of the expectations that come with it, and because of the way it dictates not only what you can do with your life, but what your limitations are as a couple. And if you ever decide to join financial forces, sometimes individual wants are subsumed by what's best for both of you. So naturally, having an open dialogue about money is crucial to not letting financial issues blow up in your lovestruck faces. When you're in a serious relationship with someone, it's not unusual for most of your money to become "group money". No, this doesn't always happen; Some couples go through their relationships and even marriages with near complete financial independence, which is great if that's what you want. But for so many couples, money becomes a more vaguely joint effort as the relationship moves forward.
And there are consequences to this: If you live together, you need to pay rent, bills, buy a new couch, silverware, etc. Your financial priorities become the relationship's financial priorities. While it's definitely still okay to spend money on yourself, really big purchases have to be run through the team. Sure, you can buy yourself that $80 dress on sale, but if you want the $800 dress, unless you're vastly wealthy, there might need to be a discussion about it first (considering for most that's, like, a whole month's rent). Before you start saying things like "But it's my money! I earned it!" (which is true, but also) here are six reasons why money actually matters in a relationship.
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