Why aren't they independent?
Why do they expect the women to do all the chores whilst they go out and have a good time or play on xbox?
There are a couple of factors in play here. The first anthropological. Men are programmed to be hunters while women
are programmed to be taking care of family and community. This is a very basic instinct.
When men go play xbox what are they actually doing? They are usually playing games which could be seen as hunting or warrior games.
It makes them feel the old hunting urge and proud of themselves. When they go out what are they doing when going out? Mostly hanging out with male friends.
It fills a similar urge. Competition is basically a hunting urge or preparing for life. In order to get your man to do these things you must
explain it to him that he is actually fulfilling a hunting urge which has no real value in life and so the only person
doing something of real value is the woman doing the home chores. If he is going to work and you also aconsider paying someone to clean or chores for you.
That would set the bar even. There are some women who complain doing chores but they dont go to work and the man goes to work and provides.
This woman has to suck it up and understand she has to fulfill her part of the instinctive equilibrium: woman takes care of community. Man takes care of hunt.