I'm not sure why things worked out the way they did in our past relationship, maybe because she was less open to communicating her feelings to you and letting you know that she wanted you to pursue her still.
Personally, I don't appreciate women or men that play emotional mind games with others. Say what you mean and mean what you say.
As for me, I enjoy my freedom. I also value my partner's right to enjoy life as he sees fit and if that means having other relationships then he has the right to do that. I am the sort of person who can be in love with more than one person at a time, and am not bothered by polygamous open relationships, so as long as there is mutual respect for everyone involved and a clear understanding.