So, my girlfriend and I sat down to read your post together. I feel the only thing we've come to an agreement upon is the fact that you're not off base. I'd like to lay down my thoughts first.
First off, I agree about the whole investment thing - when someone is so invested into someone else's life it is difficult to pull away. Some find it easier than the rest but that's not the case for the majority of our species. The minority often questions as to why the majority suffers from the simple fact of walking away from something as bad as an abusive partner BUT just like everybody in the entire universe, we have our strengths and weaknesses. Secondly, I feel the whole 50 - 50 is surreal as there is always one partner that's more dominating in the department of giving. To me, this is the case no matter how many cherries you'd like to put on this cake. Lastly, economics might share lots of common grounds with love. This seems easy to comprehend for most as love covers a very wide spectrum, overshadowing economics and etc.
Overall my girlfriend has her own opinion on this - I agree from the above that love plays a huge part in a relationship , Abuse comes in many forms , I've experienced it in my life ,it is something you can't run away from not even a drug could help with the pain that an abuse victim carries . Although talking about it helps very much in my knowledge . There's only a certain amount of people who'd actually listen . My conclusion to this is to read and write as it helps and wouldn't make you feel like you're alone in this world because after all, loneliness kills . Nothing else in the world would make a person happier other than having people who actually love you, in your life.
What i can conclude from this would be to love, just love. For not loving would be the greatest sin. We all have our own kind of issues and for some it happens to be an abusive relationship but there are ways for this to be dealt with. I also hope that one day I'd be able to witness a relationship that would be 50 -50 in my book or even more, to experience one.
**Just thoughts we thought would be helpful, or at least add to someone's life here. Spread the love y'all. Cheers and as Ellen says, " be kind to one another".
I should have been more clear. 50/50 is the ideal, though an unrealistic one. I doubt it can ever be reached completely, but the main point about that is that sometimes it's healthy to let your parner do stuff for the relationship. What I mean is that oftentimes people make the mistake of doing too much for a relationship, leaving the partner with nothing.
And then the relationship doesn't mean as much to the other person.