I made promise of sharing some secrets I have never shared with anyone who
knows me in a Book I am working on and here it is.
THE SECRET ME
Chapter 1..
Introduction
I am a quiet person by nature. Always told not to do this and not to do that. So I never stepped out of the shell my parents placed me in. Always afraid to be seen or heard. I am still the one family member who everyone hardly hears when I speak an account of me speaking so low. So shyness and lack of confidence intertwined with always being afraid to say something embarrassing or corny. This made me keep my mouth shut for fear of being ridiculed. Boy was I timid. But what I have learnt is that you have to choose what and who you want to be in this life. Some things though, I don’t think I chose. I never chose to have these strong feelings so young in my life. I did choose to accept it though and this is my story.
Chapter 1
Inquisitive
Have you ever wondered why you are a certain way? Why you are so different, weird or have feelings you think some other people don’t have? I was like that for years, but now I embrace me. I think I was born this way. An inquisitive mind that gets a high from the thought of intimacy. It gives me an high, a natural high. So I guess you could say that I am addicted. I was about 6 years old living with my grandmother, because my mother had to work and she couldn’t afford to pay anyone to take care of me while she was out. I remember the yard was huge, flowers everywhere, and was always lively with all the people that stopped by to visit my grandma. Not to mention all the people she took in to live with us because they were sick and had nobody else that had time for them. She was like that, until the end. There was one older girl named Jennifer that my grandma took in to live with us, she was tall, maybe around 15 or 16 years old at the time. Needless to say, I grew fond of her and got a bit excited in my pants when she was around. I wasn’t sure of what was happening because I was so young but it felt good.
My grandmother went out sometimes, and the bus stop was quite a distance away from the house. So whenever she went out I knew she wouldn’t be back for a long time. I was a good kid, but I was also a boy, and boys will be boys as they say. So I would get up to my little mischiefs until she returned. There was one such day when my grandmother left me home and asked Jennifer to keep an eye on me. The day progressed and she did her chores and I played with my toy Police car that my mother had bought me a few months before for my birthday. Time went by quickly, and soon it was nap time. Jennifer told me to come lay down beside her and try to go to sleep, but my mind was active and I couldn’t sleep. I laid there looking at her as she drifted off to sleep and noticed her underwear was exposed. I was always curious about what girls had and often wondered why there wasn’t a bulge like I had. She was on her back fast asleep and I got up and began pulling her panties to the side. There was a lot of hair down there and that puzzled me because I had none. I quickly got passed that discovery and pulled it aside even further. Her pussy was dark around the lips and pink on the inside. My little dick got hard as this familiar yet strange excitement took me over. I inserted my fingers inside her and she moved and seemed to have exhaled a little. I was scared and excited all at the same time, because I knew I was doing something wrong.
I wanted to see it better, so I got up and started removing her underwear. She was much bigger than I was, but I managed to get it off without much trouble. Her body seemed to be in communication with my touch because I also was able to move her legs apart revealing a hairy little beauty between her legs that I never knew existed on girls. It was now leaking I noticed as I played with her and explored her insides. Poking my finger in and out and looking at it with intense curiosity. It was a beauty, a mixture of pink with milky white and I liked the way it smelled.I heard her moan a few times and I could have sworn that her eyes opened. My little heart was racing and my little cock was rock hard. I couldn’t understand it but I was too busy to think, I just wanted to explore my new discovery some more. That was my first experience with pussy and I remember it like it was only yesterday. I explored her many times after that I not only smelled my fingers the other times, I also tasted them. I was so young but had this desire in me to taste a pussy. I think that’s why I grew up with that urge to taste a woman or maybe it was the magazines I read that had that in it. I read in magazines how the men would go down and take the woman into their mouths, tasting it with their tongues, and I wanted that. But that was taboo then and I never wanted to be the odd one, or that nasty boy. I however remember that first time and continue to wonder if that is what made me into the freak that I am today. Thinking about it now, She never once woke up, and it was always so easy to get her undies off and her legs seemed to always opened almost automatically since the first time. I really do think she allowed me to but I never had the courage to ask her now that I am a grown man. Maybe it is out of respect for her marriage, or maybe a part of me still thinks she just slept that dead and still has no clue that a six year old violated her.
I did many things growing up, that to myself then I would say that I was strange or maybe a bit too sexual. My first time I had a fetish, I was in the third grade. I think I was about 9 years old and we had a substitute teacher because my teacher was off sick for awhile. She was so beautiful, light skin, slender bushy haired woman with straight nose and a smile to die for. Much straighter than my teacher had. Her nose was round and a bit shine all the time. I never once looked at little girls my age, they had no breasts or sexy features like a older woman does. There was one afternoon at school, when we all came back from lunch and my teacher was at her desk with her shoes off. Work was already on the chalkboard to be written off, but I was lost on her pretty feet. I found myself getting turned on and when the bell rang for us to leave, I was the last one to stand because of the obvious party going on in my pants. That was another time I can remember that I was influenced by an older woman. I from then had that urge for a woman with pretty feet and had no problem kissing them too. One could say the freak inside me was evolving.
Stay Tuned for more revelations .
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Let me know what you think.. Should I reveal more or should I hold it back?
Valentino out!!!