Is motherhood a sacrifice or a privilege?- Karen Rinaldi
I never know when will I be ever ready to be the perfect mother to my child. When I learned that I am pregnant I was so happy and overwhelmed. I really wanted to have a baby but I am scared of the responsibilities that cater smart parenting.
Welcoming my Angel
October 18, 2017, was my due date to give birth.However, I was diagnosed with pre-eclampsia so we immediately decided to give birth earlier to lessen the risk of danger for my baby and for me.
I gave birth to a 2.145 kg. baby girl last October 5, 2017, thru C-Section. My baby was very small and thin, but for me she is the most beautiful baby in the whole wide world. Thus, we named her Maha Lin ( The name was a combination of names the first one is Maha which comes from the name of the angel Mahasaiah and Lin that comes from her grand father Orlino).
I still remember when I first saw Maha Lin, the feeling is unexplainable. I was filled with gladness and unspeakable joy that I already delivered her . But I really felt pain everywhere, my body was in excruciating pain and I was not able to move then I felt hopeless.
On Being a First Time Mom
Sleepless nights and my aching body was the real enemy. I was telling myself that I need to be very a responsible mother. There were times I had to argue with my hubby and I just cry out of the blue. Sometimes, for no reason, I felt so alone and that I was in deep despair.
No one can tell that motherhood is an easy breezy task, the struggle is real and most of the time I was crying. I did not learn this from school, there is no course on how to be a perfect new mom to the universities that I do know of. There may be seminars but no actual and real training to go through. There are real challenges along the way, it is a totally different thing.
Maha Lin's first few months struggle
Whenever Maha Lin was in pain I always cry especially in the instances wherein I do not know what to do. I shouted at my hubby when he is nagging me about what we should do. What the "FCK"!*. I always wanted to shout and to have a break and tell her Go back where you came from due to my frustration.It is killing me on the inside seeing that my child is crying in pain and I do not know what she wants or maybe what she needs.
Days become weeks and later on become months, and then I was able to be familiar with her moves. I already know how to check her diaper, make burp after feeding her and to dance and sway with her until she fell asleep (well this is my expertise now). I experienced postpartum depression after I gave birth to her.Sometimes I feel that I just want to run far away from all the troubles I experienced at that point. There's always a battle in my mind, and I have to stronghold my sanity over my lunatic tendencies.
Maha Lin's smile is the perfect epitome of bliss that I have in this journey of motherhood.
However, when I see the smile on her face there's always a sense of fulfillment of my being. I feel very different and it feels so good to me that even if everything is wrong I can feel that there is something right. She is waking up my whole being to be responsible and able to be the best parent I can be for her. When I see her smiles every morning I know that she will always make my day. I know that her genuine smile will make my life worthwhile to live on.
Mommy and My Angel Time
I am always waiting to see Maha Lin's lips curl, I am not getting tired to encourage her to smile always and to have some fun. I am always giving time to talk to her as often as possible. I am frequently making eye contact and smile at her throughout the day. I am always making funny faces and noises, mimic animal sounds and behaviors and blow raspberries on her belly. I am also playing with her favorite peek-a-boo. I am really helping her to develop her ability to regulate her emotions and to learn and learn each day until she grows old.
My Maha Lin will always grin and I know that she will do it again and again. My eyes really brighten up when I see her wide smile on her very cute face. Her gooing sound reciprocates with my beaming smile towards her. And even if I will change her yucky diaper, I am always happy for I know that she has a happy face there waiting for me to give back her healthy smile. Her small giggles and waves of giggling make my heart beat fast and telling myself how lucky I am to have Maha Lin in my life. And I am also excited on her squeals of full-out-belly laughs that shows off her newfound social savvy. I know that my Maha Lin really wants the full attention to her. And I will always give her the best of the best of life.
Maha Lin is already four (4) months old, I know she is already exploring this world and she is jonesing to learn more about the objects that surround her. She is already starting to understand and recognize happy and funny faces. Actually, as my little one, Maha Lin, starts exploring the world, I know that she will be torn at times. One part of her really wants to be fiercely independent and the other part wants assurance from us.
Her Mommy and Daddy will always be still there for her. And I know the best thing to do is also the easiest: Hug her tight and never let go. She is our life and she is the reason for our existence. I want to be at her side as she explores her milestone of growing up.
My Final Message to my Angel
Since I know that all stored in Blockchain will be in here forever for sure Maha Lin will see it in the future.
I know that even If I face life's trials and problems, I will always have a reason to live, your smile is enough. My sacrifice is a special love that is unbounded by the privilege it carries to be a selfless mother to her child. Truly, you are the reason for me to survive, for me to stay and for me to fight.
Thank you @hundredlbsbeauty for Project S.M.I.LE. contest, I hope you like my story on my journey as a mother to my Maha Lin.
Thank you everyone for reading this article. Please follow and check my other works @livsky.
Thanks to @pipo092281 and jon24jon24 for introducing steemit, @tpkidkai for mentoring and editing and @steemitfamilyph (ohana) for all the support.
@surpassinggoogle is a generous person. He is admired by "Ohana". I hope you will support him as a witness by voting him at https://steemit.com/~witnesses and type in "steemgigs".
Soon to be a celebrity Maha :)
Yes! You will be the manager😂
Awww such a precious story and baby.
Indeed a child's smile is such a gift and balm in one's soul.
You are awesome.
Thanks boss mavs!🤗
Livsky, this is a wonderful work and story. Thank you for joining the contest and thank you for sharing your smile story. It is both exciting and scary to have a baby. Carrying your baby in your womb is like a glimpse of the challenges that lies ahead. All this difficulties don't matter though once you see your baby. You've been through a lot and I am glad that both of you survived. "MAHA LIN" also mean to love in english, what a well thought name.
May this story bring hope and smiles to all moms, moms to be, and planning to be moms. I am all smiles reading this and seeing the pictures of your baby. :) I may not know how it feels to be a Mom and I am far from that phase, but I know how special it is to become a mom.
Please wait for the announcement of winners on Feb 12 2018. :)
Thank you so much @hundredlbsbeauty. Being a mother is really a full time job without pay. The compensation I get is the smile that I receive from Maha Lin each day. And it's worth the pay, there is no equivalent amount of a mother's love. To our mother and to all mothers, salute to them so much. Thank you that somehow you like this story. 🤗🤗🤗
Very cute baby with very nice smile!
Thank you very much!🤗
What a lovely kidddddo!! Welcome to motherhood sistah!! The pain during labor and uncomfy sleeping is all worth it, right? ;) <3 (I got kids too, 3 angels!)
Yes sis, a child is really a gift. No written explanation how they bring happiness in the family. The unexplainable joy when children are around you. Thanks sis. Hugs and kisses to your kiddos🤗🤗🤗😘😘😘💕💕💕
When I read this story as a draft. I told myself this one is really a heart-warming piece.
Thank you for sharing this amazing story on this platform for sure Maha Lin will be thrilled to see this post once she is old enough to read. She will see how she is loved by her mom.
Thank you @tpkidkai for making this article wonderful... I will let her know that you are the one who editted and inserted all her beautiful photos and make is as beautiful as it is. Salamat bro.
Mahaba haba pa ang lalakbayin namin ni Maha... Magsisimula pa lang kami... 👶👶👶🍼🍼🍼
From name alone she is truely loved.Maha is lovely and the story too.
Thank you so much... 👌🤗
You got a 2.75% upvote from @masterbot courtesy of @livsky!
You got a 0.92% upvote from @masterbot courtesy of @livsky!
Sis, your baby is sooo cute. I also love the name, Maha Lin! 😊 You're a great mom, and I'm sure you'll be able to raise her well. I enjoyed reading ur story! Proud of u!
Thank you sis @chinitacharmer!!! I know you are also a great mom... hugs🤗🤗🤗 cheers to all great moms and mom to be...🥂🥂🥂
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