I have to keep coming back to read this one. The first few words of this post keep jumping out at me on my feed. It is true, simple and profound. I've read a lot on peaceful parenting and this comes up over and over again. I've worked hard to try to remember to see what unmet need I have when I'm angry and to investigate the same when one of my family, friends or acquaintances are angry.
Pam Leo [Connection Parenting] has a powerful method she teaches of acknowledging feelings. In the process of attempting to acknowledge someone's feelings [maybe particularly a someone who is angry with you] you have to work out what unmet need they have in order to acknowledge. When she had me carry out some role play exercises at the beginning of her book I FELT very markedly how loving you feel toward the person who acknowledges your feelings and how the anger and fear just dissipate.
Indeed! I was watching Jeremy Corbyn [Labour leader in the recent UK election] being interviewed on a news programme in the UK and he was saying very clearly that we need to sit down and talk with people. That was the basis of his foreign policy. He was brave enough to say that is the only way ... and he was saying this in the immediate wake of the Manchester bombing that we were all reeling from [I live close to Manchester and have taken my kids numerous times to the arena that was bombed]. He has great courage and authenticity [for a politician!] ... I don't see him as much of a solution in himself ... but I think he is very right that we need to know what needs are unmet and work out how we can come to terms to meet them.
I have to keep coming back to read this one. The first few words of this post keep jumping out at me on my feed. It is true, simple and profound. I've read a lot on peaceful parenting and this comes up over and over again. I've worked hard to try to remember to see what unmet need I have when I'm angry and to investigate the same when one of my family, friends or acquaintances are angry.
Pam Leo [Connection Parenting] has a powerful method she teaches of acknowledging feelings. In the process of attempting to acknowledge someone's feelings [maybe particularly a someone who is angry with you] you have to work out what unmet need they have in order to acknowledge. When she had me carry out some role play exercises at the beginning of her book I FELT very markedly how loving you feel toward the person who acknowledges your feelings and how the anger and fear just dissipate.
Indeed! I was watching Jeremy Corbyn [Labour leader in the recent UK election] being interviewed on a news programme in the UK and he was saying very clearly that we need to sit down and talk with people. That was the basis of his foreign policy. He was brave enough to say that is the only way ... and he was saying this in the immediate wake of the Manchester bombing that we were all reeling from [I live close to Manchester and have taken my kids numerous times to the arena that was bombed]. He has great courage and authenticity [for a politician!] ... I don't see him as much of a solution in himself ... but I think he is very right that we need to know what needs are unmet and work out how we can come to terms to meet them.
Cheers, @sallylloyd.