BREAKING NEWS ... Dan Larimer buys out Justin Sun's stake in Steemit! EXCLUSIVE INTERVIEW

in #steem20 days ago (edited)

Following is an exclusive interview between @quillfire and @dan regarding his just-announced buyout of @justinsunsteemit's stake in Steemit Inc.

Quill: "So Dan, congratulations on your acquisition of Steemit Inc. Ironically, things have come full circle. I have to admit, though, this acquisition takes me, as I suspect it will take many others, by complete surprise."

Dan: "When opportunity knocks. I could see things weren't going to work out for Justin Sun so I decided to intervene and make things better for everyone involved. To salve the wounds of war, so to speak."

Quill: "Blessed is the Peace Maker. I am curious, though. Given the existing capabilities of EOS and Voice, what does the STEEM/Steemit acquisition bring to the table?"

Dan: "Well, obviously, I don't want the two blockchains and their respective social media platforms to be so similar that they cannibalize each others user base. So, I envision developing EOS and Voice for 'general population applications' while morphing STEEM/Steemit into a platform for 'specialists.'"

Quill: "Specialists? Intriguing. Could you give me a specific example?"

Dan: "Well, Quill, you're a poet, right? You write traditional poetry which utilizes a fixed meter, rhythm and rhyme scheme. It's an art form that requires a lot of literary skill. But what about poets who can't meet your strict standards of literary construction? Ones who just want to write grammatically and syntactically incorrect sentences that don't make sense."

Quill: "You mean 'Free Verse.'"

Dan: "Exactly."

Quill: "So ... you envision creating a home for Free Verse poets on Steemit. A place where they could find and interact with one another ... while still sheltering the world from their artistic endeavors. It's almost charitable. What about the underlying STEEM blockchain? Could Dev's still use it for creating DApps?"

Dan: "Of course. But again I envision that such DApp development would be specialized in nature."

Quill: "For example?"

Dan: "Well, for example, DApps for deciphering all those Free Verse poems. I never know what the Hell any of them mean. I memorized one just so I could sound pithy and profound at parties but, if I'm being honest, I haven't the faintest idea what it's about."

Quill: "Really? Do you remember how it goes? Maybe I could break it down for you."

Dan: "Actually, that would be great. OK, here it is:

Of the ferments in Heaven, lament

Like locusts in a pale tent

It rains

I cry


Quill: "Oh Christ, who wrote that?"

Dan: "@d-pend."

Quill: "Oh, that guy. Why am I not surprised? Sorry mate, I've got nothing."

Dan: "No problem. The STEEM Dev's will create a DApp to unravel such semantic enigmas."

Quill: "Dan, I have to admit, that's actually a pretty good idea. I wonder, though, how the Dev's will react. And the Whales and Witnesses. A lot of them have pet projects they'll be reluctant to axe in this reorganization."

Dan: "I don't think it'll be particularly problematic. They've just faced an Extinction Level Event and I think they'll be so happy just to have survived that they'll be moved by their muse."

Quill: "I don't know, Dan. I've been reading Whale and Witness posts for a long time. They're not a particularly literate lot. I once published a satirical post in which I introduced a new genre of poetry, "Misspelled Prepositional Poems," which featured my alleged Magnus Opus, 'The.' I was being sarcastic. @theycallmedan gave me a 100% upvote and @bluemist commented, 'Bravo, sir, Bravo. I shall weep for a month.'"

Dan: "Fair enough. But it doesn't all have to be about Free Verse, does it? Some people are more naturally inclined to express themselves visually than verbally. So, I have an idea for that too."

Quill: "Hit me."

Dan: "Well, my brainstorm is actually based upon one of your prior posts."

Quill: "Really. Which one?"

Dan: "The post about mimes."

Quill: "Mimes? You mean, 'An Ode to a Guilotine?'"

Dan: "That's the one. Mimes have become social pariahs, in no small measure because of people like you: Snotty artisitic bullies with no sympathy for the talentless ... no offense intended. But everyone needs to belong, right? Even those who society has traditionally burnt at the stake. STEEM/Steemit will become their new home."

Quill: "And you think the Whales, Witnesses and Dev's will get on board with all this?"

Dan: "Sure, why not? It's all about providing a solution to a problem. No one has ever understood why mimes do what they do, so why not help them deliberate upon the demented? An 'intelligence presence' in computers ... necessitated by an 'intelligence absence' in humans."

Quill: "And so, maybe a DApp for interpreting ... Interpretative Dance?"

Dan: "If that's what you call that shit, sure. And given the maniacal state of the Millenial generation, there'll be a near-infinite amount of material in need of a near-infinite number of DApps. Everybody wins."

Quill: "Jesus Dan ... I'm sold! You're a friggin' genius. And on that note, I would like to close by thanking you for entrusting me to deliver this important news to the blockchain. I'm sure the community will be delighted by your efforts to save it from oblivion."



Hahaha. I've been awaiting your return — who knew it would be so personal?
Take my pitifully depreciated upvote sir!

....and by the by, there are far too many damn Dans around these parts.
It gets confusing.


Hey mate. I hope you liked your hat. :-)

I was going to have Jerry Springer buy out Justin Sun but didn't think anyone would believe the headline. How are you making out?



Thanks Joey.

Ironically, as I was writing it I couldn't help but to mull over ways to actually make it work. In the end, I had to cut a few bits because the interview was beginning to sound like ... a good idea. :-)


Time for some good satire, you have been missed!

Obviously reading quietly on the sidelines brewing up a grand retort, welcome back @quillfire


And I've missed Steemit, especially the PHC crew.

When picking a new Pope, they lock all the Cardinals in a room and no one comes out until they've reached a consensus. It's called a "Conclave."

What if ... we made both Justin Sun and the Top 20 Witnesses do the "Jazz Hand Dance" every day, on video, until they'd reached a deal? I suspect they'd come to a resolution pretty damned quickly, don't you? It's all about providing the right kind of incentives. :-)

Good to hear from you.


Seeing some white smoke come out of the chimney stack would be an excellent option.

Good to have you back @quillfire

I may have snorted a few times :)


Hey Carl.

You're laughing now but give the Civil War another couple of weeks ... all this is going to sound both brilliant and prophetic! :-)




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As always, kudos to you folks for doing the great work that you do.


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What a way to wake up. Will return when I really am...awake...


@quillfire, I have but one criticism. You forgot one very important category of specialists. One which comprises really important people - for starving poets...

Or is it a case of too many cooks spoiling the broth?

In all seriousness, thank you for the chuckle. Much needed with all the FUD and paranoia - not just on Steemit, but with the Covid-19 crap stuff, too.



I was going to include "'specialists' who habitually cook their meat over a campfire in their back yards despite owning perfectly functional barbecues, ovens and microwaves" ... but I thought better of it. Provoking the entire nation of South Africa violated my instincts for self preservation. :-)

I actually had created a LONG post explaining to Justin Sun and the Witnesses exactly how to resolve their impasse. I deleted it. People are not fighting due to a paucity of ideas. They're fighting because they want to save face. Logic doesn't work to resolve such conflicts. They're going to have to do it the hard way.

So, instead, I went for 'comic relief."

Laughing won't solve the problem but it will lighten the load of having to carry it.

Good to see you again.



I was going to include "'specialists' who habitually cook their meat over a campfire in their back yards despite owning perfectly functional barbecues, ovens and microwaves" ... but I thought better of it. Provoking the entire nation of South Africa violated my instincts for self preservation.

Occasionally, it seems, brains triumphs over brawn.

I fear that this impasse has only one outcome, and not one which the little fish and even many whales and orcas would prefer. And I say this from the position I've adopted during most of this:


Good to see you again.


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Wasn't supposed to have been for me!! STOOOPID!!


Calling you in on this post ... laughter is the best medicine.


 20 days ago Reveal Comment