I will say i think your technical background comes through in the writing. There are really specific references to things like places, character characteristics and items. This is true in the first couple of chapters. I'm only through chapter 3 right now. I thought it was interesting as an engineer I also highlight details because that's what I'm use to doing at work. Some of the early examples that stuck out are the vegan diet, listing the Costco company trailer, and naming all the highways. As I enjoy short stories, I'll have to keep reading to fill in the gaps.
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Thank you. I tried to keep the story as probable as possible, using real space names.
It does help. I’ll take the time and read the remaining chapters and give you my thoughts. I’ll also give any suggestions on grammar. However, I’m not always the best considering I typically deal with numbers all day.
Good, I am waiting for your comments.