The man I have loved for 8 years, the man who said he would marry me 8 years ago. Tonight is that man's wedding!
My whole world stopped as soon as I heard that.
I woke up, but I was still lying there with my eyes closed, and my sister whispered in my ear that he had come. I jumped up as soon as I heard it. Has he really come? Is the wait coming to an end? But this happiness did not last for a moment. My sister immediately said in a cheerful voice,
'You know, sweetie, today is Aharnish Bhai's wedding.'
Wedding! It was as if I could not believe it. I asked my sister again. My sister said, tonight is a 'homely' wedding. I could not believe it, so I went to Aharnish after freshening up.
After searching for a while, I found her in the courtyard. I saw that she was talking to someone on the phone. I pulled the veil on her head like a hijab. I went closer to her. He looked at me with a frown. After some time, he said in a cold voice on the phone, 'I'll call you later.'
He looked at me with a happy face. He came closer and said,
'Hey, sweet and sour! How are you? You've grown up a lot! I saw you when you were a child.'
My mind was a little upset. I felt a little bad. When did he start calling me 'you'? No smile came from my face, but I forced my lips to spread. I said in a weak voice,
'Alhamdulillah, you're fine! You?'
He smiled. This smile seemed to be my undoing. He said in a happy voice,
'By the grace of Allah, I'm fine. And how can a boy's marriage not be good?'
My heart yearned for him! Hearing those words, it felt like someone had hit me in the chest. I took some time and said in a calm voice with a plump face,
'You--are you really getting married today?'
He bit his lip and smiled shyly. He said,
'Yes, tell me what else I should do! I'm getting old day by day. How old do you think I am! If I stay single like this, will I get another girl?
I remained silent. My heart was confused, divided. The desire that I had in my heart was over.
'What are you studying?'
I gathered myself and said in a trembling voice,
'I'm in the third year.'
Immediately he bit his tongue and held it. He looked at me with a sharp gaze. Then he smiled softly and said,
'Oh, I forgot. I heard from my father. You must have given a gap in the admission?'
I nodded my head and agreed. He was looking at me with eager eyes. Some time passed. No one said anything. I bowed my head. As I looked at him, our eyes clashed involuntarily. This was the abode of love. The long-lost love is merging with each other. The tenderness of love is approaching. Love is like this. Suddenly he came close to me and said,
'Why are you eating Senti? Do you still have a quiet nature?'
Immediately I became speechless. I remained silent in response. He became worried and said again in a deep and firm voice,
'This Senti? What happened to you?'
I stared at him with a weak gaze. It was as if my eyes were quenching their thirst. After a while, I broke the silence and said in a dull voice, 'Do you remember, when you were little, you said that you would marry me?'
He frowned and looked at me. Then he started laughing. He laughed for a long time. Then he stopped and said,
'Oh, you've reminded me of a good thing, Jhumbarshti. You were a little girl then! I really enjoyed making you angry. Do you remember how you used to get angry?'
I swallowed. My chest was beating faster. My breathing was getting heavier. My eyelids were unmoving. So were you really having fun that time? Because I was young? I braced myself and said in a trembling voice,
'I mean..I mean you, you were really having fun with me?'
Immediately his smile stopped. He looked at me with a sharp gaze. Steady, full of intense determination. A fine crease appeared on his forehead. He poured out intense seriousness and said,
'Isn't that so? Then I would honestly say all this to a girl like you? And besides, I have no interest in you.'
The last word hit me like a shot to the chest. It's open all around, yet it's hard to breathe! It's suffocating. It's like I'm breathing in poisonous air. He spoke in a silent manner and picked up the phone again. His eyes were getting wet. Uncontrollable tears were rolling down. He tried to force a smile. Taking a deep breath, I said in a dull voice, "Oh, okay. Okay, I'll go now." Before Aharnish could look away, tears were streaming down my face. I quickly went to my room. It was quiet, deserted, and there was no one. I went inside, closed the door, and sat on the floor with my knees bent. I couldn't hold back my sobs. Uncontrollable tears started falling down like rain. Did he make fun of me for all this because I was young? But I was stupid, I had been waiting for so long thinking it was true. I had awakened a feeling of love for him in my heart. I had dreamed so many dreams about him in the dark of night. And that he would marry someone else? Was it my fault? I understood the opposite? Earlier he used to greet me as 'you' and now - 'you'? He never called me by my name. He used to call me by my given name. But was it all a lie? To make me angry? Because I was young? I loved him so much for those 8 years, thinking it was true!
The name of my ocean of love. Aharnish. Little by little, the affection in my heart for him has turned into love over the years. The intense anguish, concentration, and pain of waiting were gradually wearing me down. A while ago, I thought maybe he would say the same thing today as he did eight years ago,
'Listen girl, I love you! You are only mine and I am yours. And I will marry you! Do you understand?'
But my feelings were crushed.