My eldest was offered a full ride to Georgetown when he was 17, and he didn't have any desire to go. I explained what it could mean, brightly envious of his opportunity, and urged him to go to no avail. My father had been a teacher until he retired, and had always been extremely critical of my homeschooling my sons, so in desperation I turned to him to convince my son and got him on the phone. You could have knocked me over with a feather when he said these unforgivable words "That's not for folks like us."
Upon reflection, dad had grown up poor, during the depression, and wrested a degree from the GI Bill after a stint in the Navy. I also have a heart to serve and after stabs at various careers, from fisherman, logger, and food service, to business consulting, market research, and marine biology for a state agency, and finally settled on handyman, because I like most providing my good neighbors repairs and additions to their homes that will provide them decades of enjoyment and quality of life even after I am dead and gone. But, like you, my eyes pop open at 4 am, although I have a variety of bad habits like lounging around and reading the internet for hours before I set to of a day. I have no college to speak of, and my positions in technical fields were hard won, as an autodidact, so perhaps that underlay my envy at my son's opportunity to be one of the movers and shakers.
My son had little schooling (after he hit puberty I realized that's where all the girls were. Some things I couldn't teach him), but had plenty of friends that had, as he was the captain of the football team and everyone else on the team had attended local schools. He explained he had no interest in being institutionalized as his friends had been, and he well knew how to find out what he wanted to learn, as that was the crux of my curriculum for him. He has carved out his own path as a professional, wholly self taught, and I confess him a better man than I am.
Maybe it's epigenetic, deriving from environmental conditions our forebears experienced, but somehow it missed him, perhaps because of my freebooting career raising him.
However, I know well that view of time, money, and hard work, because it's also in my bones.
Thanks!
Those generation gaps can be really tough. We're all so scarred and influenced by our life experience and struggles. Your father's generation went through so much. I wonder if your son ever thinks about how different his life would have been if he would've taken the scholarship? I had a cousin who passed up a similar opportunity, she had a full ride to Ohio State. She's doing quite well for herself now after putting herself through a smaller college, it just took longer.
As a child (starting around 12) I did everything I could to earn money -- lawn care, snow shoveling, paper routes, restaurant jobs. My dad asked me to come to work in the welding shop that he did after I graduated high school. I, instead, went to community college at night and worked manual labor jobs during the day to pay for it. I've always liked self-directed learning too and really have never stopped seeking new things to learn about. I never had to take out a loan for school, and for that I'm grateful. That instantly puts young people at a disadvantage during their best earning years. Those 3 years of community college got me a job at an insurance company here in MN and I worked there for 23 years (saving as much of my salary as I could ) doing a variety of things, until I could retire early and write for a living.
You sound like you've had a very interesting and well-rounded life so far! Working with your hands provides so much satisfaction. I'm sure your neighbors really appreciate you. There are fewer and fewer people around with those skills. Thanks for your comment!