If I haven't grown up, I wouldn't have realized the truth behind the quote, "Life is too short". Back in the childhood days, 70-80 years seem so long. How could anybody say it's too short? But when I hit my teenage years, I realized not everybody is given the chance to even live that long. And when I hit my twenties, that's when the quote made all the sense. Life is indeed too short. You're only given a very short amount of time to do what makes you happy, find and fulfill your purpose, create an impact on the lives of others and live meaningfully. And that truth is what makes time so valuable.
Upon realizing this, every minute of every hour of my everyday started to have more value. There's definitely no more time for slacking off or being unproductive. Since I hit my twenties, aside from having work, I usually spend more time outdoors and traveling since that made my soul happy. I become engrossed with the feeling of getting lost and finding myself and I forgot that there are also people at home who needs me. This realization did not make such an impact in my life until recently.
I do have this very close friend with whom I spent 6 years of friendship with. Meeting and knowing him is such a pleasure and a blessing. He used to make everybody in our choir group laugh with his sarcastic jokes and cheerfulness. When he's around, the room seems to light up right away. He's a ball of positive energy. We all will definitely know it's going to be a happy and good day just because he's around.
And the more time both of us spend together, the more we grew closer. Everyday after choir practice, we will walk home together and just talk about everything. He's somebody I can talk to about my dreams and frustrations and he's someone who patiently listens. I also do the same for him and we're always on each other's side.
And then he graduated college and had to start working. From then on, we see less and less of each other due to busy schedules. I'd see that he's very happy with his job he got at the airport and sometimes we'd catch up online through exchanging messages. As far as I know he is doing okay. And then it became quiet. I did not hear from him for several months until one day he contacted me and asked where I am. I'm not nearby as of that moment since I went away to go to some place. When I returned home, I immediately asked if I can see him and that's when I found out he got sick due to overwork and got hospitalized that time he contacted me. I saw him and his physique is very different from the way I remembered him. His weight dropped and I instantly became very worried and at the same time, felt bad and guilty because I was not there the moment he needs me.
After that event, I made sure to see him regularly and ask him how he's doing. Because of his condition, he had to stop working to be able to recover. So he's mostly alone all the time. Only very few friends of his knows his current health condition. He still has that positive attitude but i notice at times he's slowly getting lonely. But after some time, I receive updates from him saying that he's already getting better and even starting to gain weight and that made me confident that he's going to be okay.
And so I had other things to do and places to go and I'm always away again. But everytime I'm away, something bad happens to him or his health starts to deteriorate again. So for the past few months, I remained nearby. I made sure to always visit him at home to simply check on him and keep him company. But what's saddening is, I notice that he's not getting any better now. It's been a year since he got sick and it's getting more complicated every time I see him. He's always in and out of the hospital but he's a fighter and he still recovers.
Until one day, I came home and had been so tired from running errands all day. It was Thursday, April 5 2018, 4:30 in the afternoon when i received a text message from him asking where I was. I told him I'm at home and asked him in return if he's okay. And then he said he's in the hospital again which is not something new anymore. But then, he also asked if I can come visit him right away and even gave me his room number. But because I have been so tired all day and had to work again later and had no sleep since I got out of the office earlier, I dozed off and was not able to send him a reply and went to work without checking my phone. At also exactly 4:30am when I took my break at the office, I noticed so many messages from our common friends asking me if I already knew what happened. And that's when dread went through every vein in my body. My close friend is dead. His body gave up at 8:30pm, 4 hours later after he sent me that message. He died at age 25. I realized how great a mistake that was that i dozed off. My body went cold and tears just started falling.
Not being with him when he asked, at his final moment, was my greatest regret in life. I should've been there with him. Up until now it breaks my heart everytime I remember what happened. In that moment, it indeed felt that life is too short. In life, the most important lessons are learned through the most painful way. Because of what happened, I realized that knowing how to spend your time is not only what matters but also who you spend it with and how that's going to make a difference in a person's life especially if the person really need it the most.
Life is short. Time is limited. But if you make good use of it and make it meaningful then it doesn't matter how much time you've got. And life becomes meaningful when you've lived not only for yourself but also in service of others.
I've learned that it is good to spend time with yourself but it is better to spend it with those people whom you love and care most about. Just because you think these people are going to be with you for a long time is not really a guarantee. Nobody knows for sure. And never take somebody's presence for granted just because they're always there. Tell your parents everytime how much you love them and regularly check on your friends. Also, make sure to lend a hand or an ear to those who needs you. Make time. It might save a life.
P.S.
this is the cheerful friend I remember
and this is when he got sick :(
Wherever he is right now, I hope he's found peace.
@chastity from my heart I want to say thank you so much for sharing brilliant writing about life. I read full of your post and thinking that we have to live this earth it's time of matter.
My goal in this post is to share what happened to me and for other people to also learn from it. I'm glad it touche you. Please, always make time for those you care about. Thank you for resteeming.