So for those of you non Scots who might be wondering what a Burns Night is...and contrary to the title, it is not a night of setting fire to things, or self immolation!
Burns Night celebrates the life and poetic works of Scotlands' favourite poet, Robert (better known as Rabbie) Burns who was born on 25th January 1759.
You will know him best as the writer of a song much loved at celebrations of the New Year. Yes that one..."Should old aquaintance be forgot"....which has everyone bursting into slurred song at the stroke of midnight...Auld Lang Syne! Only Scottish people know ALL the words, and only TRUE Scottish lads and lassies actually KNOW what ALL the words mean. But I digress.
So for those of you wondering what actually happens on Burns Night...the answer is simple.
It's a great excuse for a hootenanny (party) in the depths of January when it can be very dreek (bleak) fresh (freezing cold) and rather dour (dull) in Scotland after all the excitement of the Christmas festivities are over! The Scots are canny (clever) in doing this because in January, once the sales are over, what else is there to look forward to? 😊
Traditionally everyone stands as a bagpipe player pipes the haggis ceremonially into the banqueting hall, commonly refered to as "piping in the haggis" into the room where the assembled diners eagerly await the feast.
The host will then say a few words of welcome and then the diners all say the Selkirk Grace;
Some hae meat, an cannae eat
An some would eat that want it
We hae meat, an we can eat
An sae the Lord be thankit
What follows next is the recitation of this venerable Scottish poem recited traditionally on Burns Night to the actual Haggis before it is eaten.* Once the poem is concluded everyone dives in and eats the usual fare of haggis, neeps (turnips) and tatties (mashed potatoes). Usually with a glass (or several) of a fine single malt whisky (preferably aged at least 12years).
A likely lad by the name of Chris Young repenned the classic poem, with a view to making a vegetarian point or two, in his hilarious and inimitable style here is a full Scottish version of his reworked Address to a Vegetarian Haggis;
To A Vegetarian Haggis
Fair fa' your dishonest sonsie face
Great Maverick of the pudding race
For veggie folk, you tak the place
O' honest meat.
Some think ye truly a disgrace
Nae fit tae eat.
But others cannae face yon haggis
That made wi' fresh sheep's stomach bag is,
Where hairt and lungs and liver clag is
Mixed up wi' oats
For squeamish folks for them the snag is
Nae Rabbie Burns's quotes.
I dinnae mean to fash nor clype
But some folk cannae stomach tripe
And kidney could nae pass their pipe
For fear they'd choke
And inside parts of every type
Would make them boke.
Frae John O'Groats tae Howe O'Fife
Sick sentiment is awful rife
But then they gang and take a knife
Tae sirloin steak
They dinnae think that flesh had life
For any sake.
The animal that's killed for meat
Has died for us, and guy few greet
We owe the beast at least tae eat
And no tae waste
The choice we have tae eat or bleat
Is no just taste.
Hypocrisy puts me on edge
The squeamish folk, they all should pledge
Tae eat from henceforth none but veg
(And maybe eggs and milk)
Frae shrink wrapped plastic let them dredge
Your ersatz ilk.
Oh ye, what untold beasties save
For whom no sheep its stomach gave
No cattle came home to their grave
Lang may ye reek
Or boilt in a pot or microwaved
It's ye I seek.
Oh meat free bairn of John MacSween
Nae life ye take, nae liver seen
Nor kidney, but the kidney bean
That gies ye heart
And nuts and lentils (red or green)
Tae play their part.
Wi' mushroom, carrot, onion, neep
It's sad ye dinnae taste like sheep
But that is fine
When frozen well for months ye'll keep
I bulk buy mine!
O sleekit pudding, sonsie-faced
Though some might think a haggis based
On vegetables, the meat replaced
Should be unlawful
I bid the world to take a taste
It isnae offal.
Chris Young 1993
I raise a glass of good Scottish whisky to you all and bid each and every one of you a Happy Burns Night!
- See here for the original traditional version of Robert Burns classic "Address to a Haggis;"
http://www.robertburns.org.uk/Assets/Poems_Songs/toahaggis.htm
For all non Scottish speakers here's a Glossary of terms, words and meanings;
http://www.robertburns.org.uk/Assets/Poems_Songs/toahaggis.htm
To see Chris recite his version of the poem see here;
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=4xo-Jk3-cvo
MacSweens Vegetarian Haggis;
http://www.macsween.co.uk/products/delicious-every-day-vegetarian/
Great vegetarian Haggis recipe;
https://www.theguardian.com/lifeandstyle/wordofmouth/2015/jan/22/how-to-cook-perfect-vegetarian-haggis
If any of you are still struggling to understand any of the Scottish words just drop me a comment and I will gladly help oot (out).
I had the opportunity to visit Scotland five years ago when it was the Burn´s Night Celebration! Definitely a great experience!
What a fantastic bit of timing @stefaniagarg you were lucky indeed to catch the celebrations, must bring back great memories for you❤️
Did you enjoy the haggis? I have to admit I cannot stand the stuff. Even the smell of it makes me feel nauseous and I grew up in Edinburgh where it is served a LOT!!! 😱
LOL @lilygolightly, I've not come across this excellent address to Veggie Haggis before. Although horrified when I first learnt of the ingredients in 'proper' haggis, I do like the veggie version- the 'meat free bairn of John MacSween', but don't eat it very often. I live in Edinburgh and, where I work, we served Haggis, Neeps and Tatties last night - without the piper, the address or the veggie version. A previous workplace used to pipe the haggis in and someone or another would recite Burns' version.
Chris Young wrote this in 1993!!!
Thanks for the poem - it's witty, funny and makes some serious points too!
Well, well, an Edinburgh laddie eh @barge??? The parameters of the world are small indeed! Lovely to know you are in Auld Reekie - do please give that fine city my fondest greetings, and the same to your good self of course! 😊
I am so glad you appreciated the veggie version of the Address to the Haggis...I loved it as soon as I clapped my eyes on it and knew I had to share it and since Burns Night was just yesterday it seemed like something of a no brainer!
We were regularly served haggis at school (the revolting meat, sheeps stomach, offal and all version) and the scent of it cooking would fill the corridors with its noxious odours turning the stomach from hungry to nauseous in mere moments...it sure was torture for this self because back then every pupil HAD to eat every single scrap of food on the plate, there were no food allergies to hide behind, vegetarianism had not been invented in Scotland at that time and school discipline was the Dickensian "thou shalt or else face the slipper" kind. I chose the slipper pretty much every time because, although it hurt, it was soon over whereas the "losing one's lunch" vomiting was so much worse and lingered far longer, along with the taste of the loathed haggis!!
Shall I go all grumpy old lady and say "Kids today don't know how lucky they are?" Nah I am still too young for that!!! 😊😊😊
Thanks again for adding your lovely comments and for showing appreciation for my bonkers sense of humour! ❤️
Yes, somehow I always end up back in Auld Reekie - roughly half my life here now! It is beautiful though eh? I'll certainly pass on your greetings :). I grew up in India, where vegetarianism is no problem at all, and universally recognized. Mum became veggie when I was 5, so only vague memories of a fish bone getting stuck in my throat - I've been veggie ever since. We were forced to eat boiled aubergine and cold porridge at school though - British-style ex-colonial boarding in the hills - discipline, discipline, discipline!!!
Ah she calls us does Auld Reekie alrighty! Like the sirens of old we all hear the call of her ancient and venerable walls (this rhyming thing really is infectious isn't it?) Thank you for saying "hi" to the old place for me!
I bet India was an education in its own right, without the need for tutors, or Saturday prep!!! And you were indeed blessed to be in a part of the world where the value of EVERY creature is still held sacred, albeit in a land of great contrasts.
Please tell me that the boiled aubergine and porridge were NOT served together in the same dish??? What is it with boarding schools are their need to serve their pupils slop? This combination of sloppy food and rigorous discipline seems a universally agreed principle whether in the far flung foothills of the Himalayas (Dehradun perchance?) or the cobbled streets of Edinburgh in the prime of Miss Jean Brodie (no I wasn't one of her Gels...I was a Mary Erskine!) the mantra is pretty much the same isn't it?
LOL, no, they kept the two separate.....Indian boarding school system totally based on the long-established system in the UK - only now changing to adopt a fuller Indian flavour. In the 80's was still reminiscent of a 50's British school! I think the 'philosophy' behind boarding schools has a lot of 'toughen them up so they no longer feel what's true to them, but learn to toe another's line'. But then, the current education system the world over is questionable - are kids being encouraged to be free, or to be trained up into bondage and slavery (primarily of the mind)?. But again, things are changing and I don't think the youth of today are as naive as we were - although perhaps more confused!
Phew thats a relief...I am not sure I could have coped with the aubergine/porridge combo, any more than I can manage to eat even a veggie haggis!
Oh yes, totally agreed...the education system is part and parcel of the mass mind control and brain washing from as early an age as possible for sure! Most govern-mentes (to rule the mind...hidden within the word itself!) actively WANT a dumbed down and compliant new generation so they have legions of unquestioning and bidable slaves.
The pressures on the younger generations are very heavy...not least in the arena of social media - something that was absent when we were growing up. But for me their lack of naivety is down to the fact that they have access to so much more information (via the internet) than we had. The pressure cooking of their childhood actually seems to me to REMOVE their childhoods completely so they grow up significantly faster, which isn't necessarily a good thing. ⭐️
Yes, very good point - along with naivety going, so does the sweet innocence of childhood.......but then, I'm not sure I had more than a handful of sweetly innocent childhood experiences (being so surrounded by the corruption of adulthood makes it difficult anyway). There's also the aspect of re-discovering this child-like innocence as an adult - without the naivety!
'Govern' + 'Mentes' - hmmm, yes, one of many hidden in broad daylight - nice one!