I like this style of writing. Needs more push on the tension building but this ain't bad at all. I enjoy the mystery and some gaps the reader has to fill in with their own interpretation of the events. Any plans on extending this to a full blown novel?
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Glad you liked it! And will keep your critic in mind for future works. Thanks for it! :D
This story per say.... No.
Don't currently have the luxury of time, sadly, to focus in writing a full out novel from start to finish.
Though that doesn't mean I don't get to edit my existint one ;)