FÁTUM — Hive

It was a night like another, cold, gloomy, bleak, lonely...

After walking some streets, the dim light of an old lantern made appear before my eyes a small mahogany bench; I lay on top of her while the faint flash of the lantern vibrated over us.

I was absorbed by the infinite gloom that surrounded me, I couldn’t notice his presence until I saw the deck of cards in front of my eyes ...

–Choose one, the one you want ...

I raised my face, half opened my eyes and tried to sharpen my view to distinguish the features of the character that extended that deck; but I didn’t succeed, in the mist I barely saw a black top hat, a wizard's black top hat, that made a shadow in the middle of his face and I saw the brightness that was reflected in his eyes. Any man would have feared, or at least distrusted of meeting a stranger in the middle of the night; but I didn’t remember being worried at that moment, I didn’t find anything extraordinary in that encounter, the brightness in his eyes it was familiar, his smile was like any other magician, pleasant, seductive, mysterious...

I selected the card, and then he extended the deck to me indicanting me to lose my card among the others, and I did it and he mixed them.

–Remember all its details, its color, its shape, its scent. He told me.

While I remembered it, the card appeared in my hands as if by magic.

–Of all the cards, you couldn’t choose a better one- affirmed seeing her with a smile on his face.

He took the card and lost it again in the deck.

The atmosphere changed suddenly, the fog turned into a thick mist, and darkness engulfed some stars that were seen in the sky, swallowed the night that surrounded us until only the magician and I remained under the slight vibration of light of the lantern. My partner seemed not to notice the metamorphosis of the environment.

–Call her by her name- he told me.

Only at that moment my body started to startle, tachycardia, hyperpnea, tingling, dilated pupils, all my senses sharpened. From one moment to the next, uncertainty invaded me ... I didn’t know who this man was, was he a real magician? What did he want from me? What did he want to show me? And why didn’t I asked it before?

Again I raised my face, and this time, maybe because of the mydriasis, I crossed my eyes with his and I clearly saw his eyes, but instead of pupils I only saw an Ace of hearts. At that moment I called my card and he lifted the first card from the deck, but it wasn’t the one I chose. He made a gesture with his hand and I looked up at him again, fixed his gaze on me and said.

–Sometimes the cards ignore our call, they leave us longing for their presence. They like to be called several times by name, try it again.

I did it and when he blinked , the aces changed to the symbol of my letter, a queen of hearts.

Is what I'm living real?

–How did you ...? -I tried asking, stunned.

I couldn’t finish my question because, as a dream experience, the magician disappeared without a trace. Suddenly the stars returned, the night, the mist, returning to be alone, only with the dim light of the lantern.

* * * * * *

Living in a fantasy is what I crave the most. The illusion of a trick far exceeds the reality in which I live. But you can’t help it, right? The tricks only work with the cards. Even if you try to immerse yourself in the deepest part of your psyche, even when you think that you have hidden yourself in the depths of the labyrinth, it seems that all the meanders flow towards it.

It is not possible to escape from that Minotaur, is it?

Madness and death are the only Theseus that I know. Yes, both execute the Bull of Minos, but with the first the Ariadne's thread is lost and it is not possible to escape from the labyrinth, there is no freedom in psychosis, just mirages; while with the death, with the last breath, the reality is poisoned and the labyrinth is destroyed.

* * * * * *

In my hands, the steel key with the power of the Fates. Finally I will have the freedom that I have wanted so much, it will stop being chimerical and it will be my new reality without losing the condition of reverie, a fantasy without end.

I am cold

I closed my eyes, when I opened them I looked at my hands, freedom flowed from them. The emotion made the stars more incandescent, or so I thought I saw. Someone tripped over my presence, looked at me and continued on his way.

Loneliness

Someone else appeared, it was her, I knew her more than I thought I knew her. Her distorted face approached me calmly, her skin felt like petals, her touch gave me warmth.

I heard screams, distant and choked sounds, as if coming from under the water. I felt that warmth, hugging me. I wanted to kiss her face but something prevented me,

Silence

... Lights? ... As a flash my surroundings changed completely, from one moment to another I was in my garden, my idyllic hiding place.

I remembered the magician's eyes with the queen of hearts instead of pupils.

I hugged her.

I kept hearing the agonizing screams, I didn’t want to listen to them anymore. She held me out her hand, I took it, and we sat under a large poplar tree. I hadn’t noticed that it wasn’t dark, we were minutes from sunset; I looked at her and saw her face light up with the golden rays of the last rays of the sun.

A heartbreaking "no" resounded in my head, and I immediately stared into her eyes.

–"Of all the cards you couldn’t have chosen a better one"she say, with his eyes fixed on mine.

For the first time, in all this time, I heard her voice, and it reminded me of the sweet melody I once composed on the piano, Libertad.

I felt a tingling in my chest.

–It's getting late

–I'm fine here, a long time ago I haven’t fetl so comfortable -I said, almost begging- I don’t want to leave.
– I also have the feeling of not wishing you to leave- she said, with an almost nostalgic look.

I closed my eyes for a moment and a great throng appeared before me, people moved desperately running in all directions, and still, in the middle of that motley mass, I distinguished her; my eyes connected with his as magnets. I saw her eyes directly, but in them there was no longer the queen of hearts, there were no pupils, only an unconscionable ocean.

I opened my eyes and I realized that we were still under the shade of the Alamo, I am holding his hand.

– One day you wrote something for me, - she mentioned, while laying her head on my shoulder - I still keep it. It was a nice detail that you sealed the envelope with the shape of my eyes.

Am I a magician deceived by a trick of magic?

In my head there was a silence much more heartbreaking or devastating than any of the screams I had heard moments before. I closed my eyes wishing to return to the previous vision, but there was only darkness; I can only hear an ethereal and distant voice that became very familiar to me.

–Why do you close your eyes? -She said- Are you looking for a reality other than this one? Look, this is our reality.

–I came thinking of a ...

–Fantasy- she interrupted- and that can be expressed in many ways, like giving something special to the girl you want ... Oh, look -she took something out of her pocket- I still have this.

I saw how she got me a gift.

"Come back!"

I felt a pulse in my chest, the wind began to blow. The sun was setting among the mountains, her head was still resting peacefully on my shoulder..

What a beautiful freedom, at least I was free to think without limits, to tell her what I always wanted to tell her.

–I learned a magic trick, I practiced it a lot - she said - Extend your hand.

I did what she asked.

–Look carefully how I do it.

Small flashes of blue light began to emerge from her face and expanded until a brilliant blue aura enveloped her completely, forming a kind of planetary nebula, in which its centre you would be able to see the bright rest of her being; that little cumulus began to gather in the palm of my outstretched hand, until it became a card, precisely the one I chose from that wizard's deck, the queen of hearts

The wind blew delicately and I felt her breath whispering to me ...

–Now you can take me wherever you want.

–It's not necessary because you always ...

–I couldn’t finish answering him, the wind blew with too much force, I took the letter in my hand and I held it against my chest so as not to lose it.

–What's going on? - I asked for.

My eyes closed again and there she was, it was not a card, it was not a cumulus of light, it was a girl again. I looked at my hand and still holding the letter.

Her eyes shone an ocean of tears. She hugged me so tightly, I managed to hear the accelerated heartbeat.

She looked at me, I looked at her and I handed him the letter that dissolved in his hands.

She looked at me, I looked at her, and my letter was now in her eyes, just as it happened with the magician.

I hope you enjoyed the story. Sorry if my English translation is not very good, I hope I have managed to transmit the same as with the Spanish version