How to Write Properly

in #writing3 years ago (edited)

I'm not long-winded in speaking and often say too little. But, I'm long-worded in writing and often write too much.

I'm writing this as a note-to-self.

There are steps to properly writing
  1. Realize that no one gives a pile of dog poopy what you write. Then...just write. This is a writer's foremost level of enlightenment.
  2. Once you achieve and acknowledge #1's enlightenment, you are liberated. You are free to write anything you wish. It is a great, great feeling.
  3. Now enlightened, do not write what you are now wishing to write and "Publish". Your mother or grandmother might read it and you do not want that. Write it out, but be sure to come back and shave it down with a wood rasp or angle grinder for politeness. That way Grandma may read it.
  4. Mull over again what it was in the doggone world that you actually wanted to say anyway. Then, follow "The Writing Recipe"(TM).


The Writing Recipe

The Writing Recipe
  1. Figure out what it is you actually wish to say as best as your little squirrel brain can figure. Then try again, harder this time.
  2. Dump all that tripe into a pot, cover, turn on HIGH heat.
  3. Take a long, long nap. Diligently watch that pot for several hours.
  4. Shut off heat, remove cover, peer down inside.
  5. Chisel out whatever is in the bottom of the pot.
  6. Publish that.

That is what you intended to write.


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