It certainly takes time to get close to being good... especially on your own work.
I can take writing apart and put it back together again to make a brilliant story, but I don't think that's what I should do here on Steemit.
That's my job, you see, I'm a Freelance Editor for a publishing company. I write on Steemit for myself.
Unfortunately, I can't give individual advice, I don't have the time and if I did that for one person, everyone else I've said no to will be annoyed with me (and rightly so).
I can only advise that you follow what I'm doing on my own writing and practice on yours :)
Good Luck!