Yet to me, it was just another tick of the list. For me, it was more about being on top of something I really enjoy conquering.
I don't get the part about enjoying the conquering thing but I do get the part where I tick something off the list which happens to be excelling over the competition. I get a few seconds of dopamine rush from the announcement then get empty after all is said and done. It's either I win or nothing and the pursuit just doesn't even make me feel like I accomplished when it's kinda expected that I win anyway or if I lose, it meant my skills and effort didn't count for shit therefore it's time to move on. What I do envy is how people can celebrate being second, third or any place like their vision has been fulfilled, I don't get it but ok, I guess that's never something I could grasp and move on. Guess we're just competing for the sake of competing without knowing our why.
It needs a little spice where I am once again seeking adventure and thrills where I can see the result in terms of numbers and making the impossible possible.
This screams INTJ, ENTJ, ENTP vibes. Going for the next big thing while burdened by wisdom to question whether it's worth it even to pursue to the end vision.
I am still trying to solve that part where now I feel some type of aversion towards money while I shouldn’t.
Though I doubt this would make sense given the difference in our circumstances, but I hope it offers some perspective to you. I had this aversion but made peace with it because the goals I'm looking to get done requires money, it's part of the greater means to be capable, let's say I want to make an impact in the lives of everyone in need, I can do things the way I do now and get limited results but opportunities open up more if I had more resources available. It can become problematic if your focus was solely to acquire money and lose the end goal while focusing too much on the process. Get some money and be capable of helping more people out, I think looking at it this way doesn't make the process be the end all.
here’s always something about “wanting more” that could typically be the downfall of these people. Usually by wanting more, they do things that are frowned upon.
You give a person 1$ regularly, they'll be conditioned to receive it and expect it the next time, their satisfaction meter raises to a higher threshold, and this continues until a new bar is set which they can't get under their normal means or have exhausted previous options. Some of these people get so out of touch with reality that they overpriced their content as if it's really that good when they can't be assed to tip the same amount if some stranger did it too, probably even better than what they made. At least, I know some of the votes I get are autovotes and not really because I did a good job or produced a valuable content, I feel sorry for the people that built their delusions on the price tag.
My other half would say it's a form of cope but my other half would be pretty understanding even if it's 2nd or 3rd spot. So I guess I kinda understand why people celebrate being the 2nd or the third but I also don't haha.
Honestly, same here. I have some goals that require more than what I am currently having, yet I am still going around about if all the sacrifices I am going to make are worth it. Maybe I should make peace with that too and just focus on achieving the said goals. Thank you for sharing your experience, it's something to think about.