Dear Steemit Friends. It's my birthday today. This year, I gave to myself a promise of new life. I also finished a painting of my first auto portrait ever. I've been working on it for a month.
I was born on Big Easter Friday. Most people believe that's the day when Jesus was crucified and entombed. Not sure if it's a good day to give my first newborn cry to the world. All I know is that back in 1979 the Big Easter Friday fell on Friday the 13th.
Thirteen was my lucky number since day one and I refused to ever associate the Friday 13th with anything but luck.
So today I am turning 38 and beginning a new cycle of my life. So much has happened in my last year. So many illusions were dismantled, so much space created, so many rock bottoms hit, so many tears shed, so much joy born, so many fears transmuted to awareness.
More than anything, I lived my first profound mystical experiences, which changed my Trust in Life and Higher Purpose forever. It left me with no doubt whatsoever that All is aligned and well and headed the right way. It left me with rock solid faith in Universal laws and Divine Grace.
Starting today, a new life cycle begins for me. It will be that of service to the Whole and manifesting of my highest possible potential in this temporary incarnated form known as Jan Kasparec. I know this might sound weird, or pretentious, but what it really means is that I do not see myself as center of the world anymore. Actually I see with crystal clarity how illusory is the whole idea of "myself" as separate entity chasing happiness in achievements and material goals.
Needless to say, I am sparkling with excitement. I know deep in my heart, that this is why I came here, this is when the Great Remembering, the electric "Aha moment" happens. I can't wait to share my fresh Love with the world.
Last year, I lived temporary experiences when my heart opened. They lasted few minutes, the longest ones about 3 hours. It is hard to put into words something that words cannot describe, and for that purpose I painted my auto portrait depicting it. All I can say- my physical "heart" (chest), vanished, it opened to infinite space, and that space was filled with boundless Love for All in existence. It was the best feeling ever. Ever. Ever.
All I want from life now is to live with Open Heart permanently. Rip it open to fierce love with no boundaries.
I captured the progress of my painting in few pictures.
The beginning. My face looks so damn funny I'm still laughing! :)
Phase two. The idea of eagle was born and more details on the landscape.
Getting there. Still missing the ping Flamingos. Lots of work on the facial expressions to be done yet.
Done! Ping Flamingos and Eagle in the dance of Cosmic DNA. So happy this vision came to me!
Thank you for the exquisite expressions of love so many of your showed me here. I am deeply touched by it and never take it for granted. We are all 1.
One glorious day we will all remember, even the most "conditioned" ones of us.
Thank you for reading my blogs, for co-creating this Universe, for being who you are.
And happy birthday to me.
To New Life!
Thank you tenderly,
Jan
@jankasparec
Happy birthday to this temporary incarnation known as Jan Kasparec. May I heal fully and rip that heart open permanently, so I can be of the greatest service to the Whole. Thank you for your wishes. I'm deeply touched. Rays of Love to all!
Word: this funny picture of myself was my faithful, patient model:)
Happy birthday , and nice painting ! :)
Thank you for your wished and kind words @happyphoenix !
An amazing painting. Upvoted and resteemed.
Happy Birthday bro.
Hope you enjoyed your day :-)
Thank you my beloved brother! Can't wait for your reading, so so so so looking forward to it. You are the best! Huge hugs in person coming in 4 weeks in Prague! @lichtblick
Happy birthday Jan. You are such an inspiration. I am always reminded, through your paintings, the power of presence and stillness. Thank you for showing us the way ;)
Thank you dearly Jaime @jaimelee !
I like it! Enjoy this new beginning and happy birthday
Thank you very much dear @natureofbeing!
Happy Birthday Jan! You're such an amazing artist.. I love seeing every single one of your pieces of art.. You truly put a lot of your spirit into them and it shows! Keep up the great work!
Also.. Hey.. Just a lil uhh. Question.. And I mean I'm generally right there with you, but.. When you say you know you're not an individual anymore and that you're like, part of everything.. You still refer to things like how happy "you" are.. And you use the word "I" a lot.. Do you think this is just something that is unavoidable while we are al"I"ve?
Do you think when you refer to your "I" that perhaps that is God's consciousness speaking as opposed to your temporary avatar? Where does your ego end and where does the universal consciousness start?
Just a lil philosophical question I've been pondering.. All the best to you man and I hope you have a great and memorable day!
Thank you for your wishes and an awesome question dear @apolymask . You said it well- yes in the form the "I" is unavoidable. From my direct experience of higher realms, the "I" merges with the Creator, where at the end, there is no self, no separation, or it can also be perceived as "Nothing but self", when "you" become everything in existence. There are many levels to everything. Good example are the energy layers of our body. The higher you go, the more collective it becomes, until eventually (after Causal body) even the individual "Soul" is shattered and the last three highest bodies merge with divine (Budhic, Atmic and Monadic body to be precise). Separate self is an illusion but it is not a mistake, nor a bad thing. It was created for a divine reason too- so that God could experience her own forgetting and the Glory of coming back to awareness. I'll leave you with this beloved friend- the Truth cannot be put into words. As soon as it leaves one's mouth, it is not the real thing. "The Tao that can be spoken of is not the real Tao", as ancient Chinese knew for millenia. I touched the Truth, but any attempt to put it into words is just a game of Maia. And that's fine and lovely too. BE WELL!
You're welcome and great response! I think you put it into words very eloquently. Thanks for the well wishes! Same to you.
Amazing work!