I was once at the market with my wife and a friend it was about 5 am and barely any people were there. I could feel a fart brewing and decided to cock my leg and let it rip.... I looked over my shoulder expecting to see my wife and my friend just behind me breathing in my poo particles... and to my horror, there was a little old man right behind me staring at me in disgust, quickly moving to the side as if he was in the path of an oncoming truck.
I could see my wife and friend stopped at a stall behind the man, they had seen me cock my leg and knew what was coming, so they had stopped and pretended like they were not even with me.
well that's now much funny....
ha ha