Haha you're so classy. I was going to say you should take some pictures of yourself defecating in the open mouths of perverted Japanese business men. But please don't. No one needs to see that.
I am glad you are out there having fun. I'm sure a new job will present itself to you. I can pay you $1 per hour to clean my house if you like. Your weekly wage will be enough to buy a coffee and cake at our local cafe once a week.
I can also give you free gym membership if that helps convince you. :D