Does anybody want to marry/adopt me/advice me on making money?

in #blog6 years ago (edited)

Dear beloved ones,

I just wanted to tell you I'm still ALIVE!
I'm eating, sleeping, drinking and copulating.
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I have been a bridesmaid in a wedding on the beach, walking down an aisle of coconuts.
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I also dropped my not so smart phone down the toilet while drunk (and flush it!) and I have been detoxing from social media, so that's what I deal with for the moment (sadly no more selfies for me).
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It's so spiritual to be with a nokia!I intimidate people with my stare and I look more at the sky.

My contract with my NGO will end in 2 months and 20 days and I'm starting to get stressed about being pennyless afterward.
Therefore in my free time, when I don't satisfy my sex addiction, I must look for jobs online.

Will I have a future of housewife? Does anybody want to marry me or adopt me? I can entertain you for good!
I can iron, cook Italian food, be your shop adviser.
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Or bring you out for some dancing action
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Do you have any tips on earning more money online?
If nobody goes ahead, I might go to Japan, eat almonds and honey for one week and get paid loads of money to shit in the mouth of a couple of Japanese perverts.
They say they pay a lot for that.

I will get back to write and comment and upvote regularly when I am sure I have a job coming up.
Write anything you like in the comments and upvote me babies.
Sandrina loves you.

Sort:  

Almonds and honey? They're real foodies, aren't they?
Do they pay extra when you splatter?

Shall give it a try and let you know...

To be honest; I don't mind if you keep that a secret.

FUCK MY LIFE
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This was not done with almonds and honey I guess ...?

Glad ur back.

Glad to be back.
A tiny bit back.
I still need to look for a job. It's important. Really important.

I knew it, you are a robot!

@sandrina.life that's not how the Singularity works ;)

You never know!

I fear you paint is chipping, and the aluminium undercoat is showing through...

Oh baby, give me more aluminium!!!

I say Japan. Then when you have made enough money you can come to Scotland and cook me Italian food and iron my stuff

I feel some love in the air here ...

LolZ!

am telling Mama Boom chico!

HAhahahaha, oh noes, caught at the flirting and attempting to create a harem game! ;O)

I just sent her a telegram about this !
it'll be there by the morrow when you're at work hahahah

just kidding ahahhaa

I will only pretend to go and wait to intercept it!!! ;0)

metaphorically I wouldn't mind to shit in people's mouth and iron around, as much as there is not intellect involved, I am a disgusting materialist millennial.

Nothing wrong with materialism! Or millennialism!

Dunno about the mouth shits though. That's one step beyond! Haha!

Finally a real good shitpost.

lol at this comment haha
how can a shit post be a good one
rotfl

That wedding looks like it was a blast. Sorry to hear about your phone though. Did you poop on it? Did you hold a funeral? What did it do to the plumbing?

I flush the water after the phone was in. I grabbed it - the water was cleaned- then, instead of turn it off and let it dry out, I pretended nothing has happened.
Theeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeen, I brought it to a cheap dodgy second hand shop in a little alley in Cambodia and it stopped to re-start.
Theeeeeeeeeen, I brought it to the official Samsung seller and they asked me 188$ to fix the machine.
I told them SCREW YOU, YOUR FAMILY AND YOUR GENERATION!!! I'm going to use my sweet nokia and socialize more.
That's what happened.

She's alive!!

Don't think of it as going pennyless, think of it as an opportunity to explore all your options. The world is your oyster and such. In any case, the most viable option for you is to become... a DIGITAL NOMAD. So it looks like you're already way ahead in the preparation for that career shift!

Letting perverts shit in your mouth pays good money too so it's a toss up.

I'm alive yes! But I really can't spend much time on Steemit anymore, at least until I don't find a proper job.
Digital nomad? It is tempting as hobby, but I also want to get a real job in real life, even if just part time.
Steemit and youtube are not paying that much for my life style, you know...

Long time no tits. I won't adopt you, but I will come to Japan with you to shit on some people anytime. As long as I am doing all the shitting and not getting shit on , we're cool. I hear stepping on live things is really big over there, we could kill some things in heels for the extra cash. Cuddle therapy makes 300 a session and I hear paid for tickle matches are a thing.

I see a future of wealth and luxury.

web camming?
Kill 2 itches with one pastime....
😂😂

I think where you are, I have not seen your post for so long

Your offers are too tempting, little girl!
And ironing board somehow don't suit you, but it do make a sexy photo.
And that part about Japanese perverts is too much detail. Seriously?

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Joe
@joe.nobel
science fiction, fantasy, erotica

Japanese really pay to get people shitting in their mouths. That's real.
I wouldn't do it.

Sounds like Japan is your best bet! My girlfriend does Virtual Assistant work online which maybe you'd be interested in!

TELL ME EVERYTHING ABOUT IT. I need anything that give me bread. I can be a very interesting Virtual Assistant! How? Where? When? @kryptocek

message @josefinemk and she can help you out! It's not extremely demanding but definitely need to have good time management and organization skills. Along with being good with computers.

If you like that sorta stuff then I'm sure you'd love being a Virtual Assistant. Most pay is between 15-20 USD an hour which actually isn't bad.

hahah cool ,nice pics, i dont get board while reading your posts ,
and you Iron perfectly lol :D
hmm,maybe you can make more videos :>

Thank you and Cheers to you! I became so good at ironing.
I made the video of my make up before wedding!

wowwwww :) very interesting and oh 45 minutes ,
i was watching for about 5 minutes and then a fast look into it ,
did you try dtube or dlive to upload it ?

I think in this platform this type of videos won't really be appreciated, that is the reason I have no uploaded it.

but i saw some videos ,like yours , doing their personal things and get votes from Dlive or Dtube , i don't know but i would like to try everything :D ,it's fun !

Haha you're so classy. I was going to say you should take some pictures of yourself defecating in the open mouths of perverted Japanese business men. But please don't. No one needs to see that.

I am glad you are out there having fun. I'm sure a new job will present itself to you. I can pay you $1 per hour to clean my house if you like. Your weekly wage will be enough to buy a coffee and cake at our local cafe once a week.

I can also give you free gym membership if that helps convince you. :D

How does shitting in people's mouths work? Do you take something to expedite the process, or are they looking for a natural poop and they stay on call waiting for you to page them when it's time?

If I ever have another wedding I want you for a bridesmaid. You are a memory-maker.

I don't know if shitting work! I never tried. Should I try and make easy money?
I know that they make the woman eat almonds and honey for 1 week before to make her shit probably with an enema...
I wish I could be a bridesmaid of more and more weddings! It's SOOOOOOOOOOO much fun :)

I, personally, would not recommend shitting for money. But, hey, I'm kind of a prude. And just think of all that shit you've just been flushing away.

Enema...why didn't that occur to me?

I also love weddings, but not really being in them. It takes a bit of that showmanship to love it I think. You've got that.

You look quite spiff, all dressed up there. So glad to see you back and in business. And sorry your dropped your phone in the swirly bowl. Makes all your messages a bit garbled, like you're talking through a snorkel. Hate when that happens!

I would consider marriage, but have been advised against it by the powers that are sure they be. Hmm, adoption. Can you set up an irrigation system? Fix my weed-eater handle that is still all bonked up? Write stories for me for Steemit, so I don't have to?
From your picture above, I suppose I COULD pay you to do MY ironing, but sounds like the Boommeister has that one all sealed up. He needs it more than me anyway. He works in an office. His shirts have to be crisp and 'just right'. Plus, I don't think I even HAVE any clothes that need ironing, and haven't ironed anything except my snow skis since I went to prom, and that was more than a few years ago. Anyway, maybe some laundry or such? I don't pay much, but it's KIND of on the way back from Scotland. And I give free snacks, just don't rummage about in the pantry past 10:00, or shrink my under's in the dryer.

On a more serious note, that's a bummer about the job. But you seem very resourceful, and personable, and smart. So I'm sure it that will work itself out. Though I know it is stressful. Japan sounds very interesting, except that one part, but there are probably many other opportunities. I've heard people pay you just to have conversations there. To learn different languages. (By the length of these comments, I'd be RICH!!)

As for online work, I'm the last person to ask. I've been on Steemit for almost two years, and have pretty much stayed the same. And that's my only online 'stuff' (hmm?) Is there much temporary work there, until you find a better job? Sometimes those things suck, but they get you by while you find better work. Used to do that a lot. So many ideas, so little money's. Good luck, keep us up on what is going on. Tillater

I'm glad to see you back. Too bad about your phone. I LOVE your hair for the wedding. Actually I like it in curlers too, you should wear it out in curlers!

Good luck on husband shopping and online money making schemes. Maybe you could marry a japanese pervert and then you could kill two birds with one stone ;)

Japanese have always been my secret fetish!

She's alivvvveeee. Whew, you had us worried beotch, tell us you're getting on a plane then disappear, shame on you! You left me with images of fiery wrecks!

Ah! Sorry babe! I really had a rejection for anything related to technology for a bit and I didn't do anything that I was doing usually.
Now, I am back looking for a job and I feel that if I get sucked into steemit like I used to do, I can't look for a job as I should.
Ah! Funemployment!

I understand beauty, no worries, just glad to hear from you- the world would be a lot dimmer without you in it!

Good luck on your search, look forward to hearing about it ;) <That means you are obligated to fill us in, haha!

Awesome to see you back!

Steemit is not the same without you...

To the question in your title, my Magic 8-Ball says:

Most likely

Hi! I'm a bot, and this answer was posted automatically. Check this post out for more information.

Anda sangat cantik sekali

Gimmie a sugar daddy!

Rachel is wearing your top, she like that thing? Suits her.

Glad you're okay! Bummer you missed the contest and weren't able to let us know to give someone else your spot in time. Oh well. Good luck finding a job! There's some possibilities online, but it can be difficult to find one that works "enough".