Do not worry at all about ever letting people down. You have been a stalwart since day 1 and we all should recognize you for the contributions you made to the game. I don't know what happened, but I do know that you have earned my respect for the things you both did (and tried to do). Sometimes we don't always get the outcome we wish, but I think you should take pride in that your efforts were noticed.
Also I hope you check in on us from time to time too. I myself have gone through several roller coaster rides with the game, and with each experience my perspective gets clearer. Maybe one day you will want to rejoin, and if that day comes you should know you will be welcomed back like you never left!
Take care, thank you for all you've done, and I truly wish you the best!!! :)
and ps... YOU WILL BE MISSED