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Sometimes really smart, rational people disagree on big, important ideas. This is normal. The trick is for us to understand and respect each other anyway.
The people you think are wrong are not necessarily stupid or irrational. It's possible they have a different epistemology than you, and they haven't evaluated it objectively. The parts of their brain which fire off to give them "truth" may be the same parts of the brain that fire off for you. This is why working to improve our epistemology is so important.
Instead of "agree to disagree", let's double down on respectful discourse. If someone is dead set on not ever changing their mind, the discussion is then more about the audience who is still open to change than an opponent wanting a divisive debate.
We're all a product of our inputs up to this point. We all make mistakes. If we can't understand each other and respect each other, especially when we disagree, we'll be left with frustration, conflict, and even violence.
I shared this on Twitter:
And on Facebook:
And I wanted to share it here as well. The more we think about this stuff and walk it out, the more we can create a world we all want to live in.
Related posts:
- "These Idiots..."
- We Disagree. Are You Ignorant, Immoral, or Stupid?
- NVC: Violence Is a Tragic Expression of an Unmet Need
Well, I can't argue with that!
I have come to agree with you. I still have strong opinions, but I've become much more willing to listen to others and to live peacefully instead of stirring up disagreement for the sake of "being right".
I also agree that it's important to keep the discussion going. Some things are worth talking about. Thanks for sharing this. We need more of it in this world.
Thanks, I agree. More of this in the world would make for a better world.
I loved the line... Some things are worth talking about. Agree.
Good point! On the other side, sometimes people seem to be in full agreement by word, but then unexpected divisions emerge as it turns out that although they were using the same words, the parties were interpreting them differently.
It would also be great if more people were able to admit they'd been wrong about their opinions, and able to change their minds, but this is often regarded as a weakness. Many therefore dogmatically cling to and defend their 'beliefs', which creates internal contradictions, cognitive dissonance and unnecessary division.
Wittgenstein would agree! So much of philosophy is really arguing over the meaning of words.
I hope more people see admitting error as strength. It means we're not insecure and our identity is not wrapped up in our labels and the things we think we know.
One of many reasons why I'm a voluntaryist.
There's an excellent chance I'm wrong about all sorts of stuff; which is why declining opportunities to impose my beliefs on others is the only ethical position.
I love that level of humility. Sadly, too few perspectives or worldviews take this approach. They are mostly so sure of their "rightness" that they don't even realize how much their actions can oppress others. I still want to make the world a better place, but I'm trying to stay humble to realize some of my ideas might actually make things worse. The best I can do is improve myself, be an example for my family, and continue loving those around me.
Well stated lukestokes. I wish we could all work on the working to understand the differences more.
Not only are you giving lip (finger) service to this issue, I have watched you live the principle as well.
Thank you for the encouragement. I do try to live out the things I suggest for others as well.
True! It's all about not having "abolute" points of view. Because this destroys the basis for every discussion and takes away the chance to learn something new.
I decided to start commenting in English just today, so please bare with me :P
Great job! I would never have known you aren't a native speaker.
I really appreciate this luke :)
Well said! Like @relationtrip said...the home i grew up in was full of "absolute" thinking. Naturally l grew up with the idea that if you didnt agree with me l would verbally spar until you did. After many years l learned something....l didnt know everything. l learned to ask more questions, and not dig my heals in so much.
Asking questions is key to understanding. :)
Yessir. I think there is so much talking, not enough listening.
Yea i see. I agree with you. Thanks for sharing 🙏🙏
You had a few (since I am here) else articles on this topic, and you seem really positive when talking about people which disagree each other. That's why I like your thinking, everybody should accept the others opinions and they should be debated in a constructive manner. The way you are thinking is mature, congrats and thanks for spreading it around the world, maybe it will become better in time!
Thank you! I certainly hope we can improve the world. :)
@lukestokes - Yes. I totally agree. Of course, smart people are usually smart enough to know that their knowledge/experience can not be all encompassing and there could be others who will form their opinions based on their own set of knowledge/experience. Smart people understand that perspectives play a big part in a lot of things in this world. Therefore, instead of arguing/ disrespecting or shunning people, smart people work on changing perspectives if possible.
By the way - your blog looked just like one of mine - with a wildlife photo and thought. LOL. Your thoughts are of course a lot more potent than mine!
Regards,
@vm2904
Ah, but the difference is I took a random photo off of pixabay and you actually take the photos!
When I look back over the last few decades of my life there are many things I have changed my mind about. I did that because I learned more, had more life experience, and talked to persuasive people with different opinions and facts.
10 years from now, I know I will look back over the last decade and see I will have changed my mind about many other things as well.
Since I don't know what I am going to be changing my opinion about over the next decade, I now assume I am wrong about most of my opinions, and look for validation that I am wrong so I can change my mind.
It's a very humbling mindset. It's also a good day when I learn something new!
Yah, I totally agree with you.
In the gathering of scholars, no theory is beyond criticism.
Disclaimer: I am just a bot trying to be helpful.
Hii@lukestokes
Very Great and effective post ....I like this post
Thnx to share this post
Yes! I agree with you ......
I agree with you lukestokes. Smart people think.
Thinking sometimes results in disagreement with other people's judgement. No one is perfect.
Wow wonderful post.
The people you think are wrong are not necessarily stupid or irrational. It's possible they have a different epistemology than you, and they haven't evaluated it objectively. The parts of their brain which fire off to give them "truth" may be the same parts of the brain that fire off for you.
Yes... that's what I said. Heheh.
You definitely have a point. Good that you shared it elsewhere too. So many times people don't stay to argue a point, they just get mad and heaven knows where that leads. Voltaire again, he wrote something like: I may not agree with what you say, but will fight to the death to defend what you're saying.
So you agree with the upcoming bitcoin gold?
Like you said... It is okay to disagree.
That doesn't mean that both parties are right. One may be 100% right, the other 100% wrong. But it rarely does any good to brow beat someone into submission. Maybe if they are about to stick a contaminated needle or heroin into their arm....maybe not even then....
I don't know.
One tangent or side topic.... In this day and age of internet information it is often the case that two sides of an argument can both support their view with facts. And sometimes...these facts can both be fact checked to be true....And yet... Even in this case, sometimes only ONE side is actually right. This is because of misinformation (or fake news) that is spouted by lying sources at the data entry point. And as long as there is money or influence to backup this lie...it sticks and seems valid. And the internet perpetuates this misinformation.
I think the blockchain can also be so misused. Not always...sometimes the immutable ledger can be used to show liars for what they are...even years down the road. But sometimes.... If there is one witness(in the judicial or scientific sense), that lies on the initial data entry point as a 'fact' is recorded...that lie will stand as fact .....possibly forever(since, in some cases, later revelations are not always able to refute past events).
Anyway, sorry for the tangent!
Keep the dialogue going!! Hopefully open dialogue will produce some good fruits!
Peace
That's a good content Sir .
Well-said. It's all about epistemology. So many people are afraid to examine their epistemology or the foundation on which they build everything they claim to know. As an ex-Muslim who has converted to Christianity after almost becoming an atheist, I can testify to how important epistemology or the theory of knowledge is.
Every theory of knowledge presupposes something about the metaphysical nature of this reality and if you get that wrong, then not only your epistemology is suspect, but so is your logic and therefore ethics. Out of the many conversations I've had with different people I disagree with, almost all of them seem to have a very hard time understanding this.
Very interesting post and great topic! :) Thanks for sharing it here on Steemit as well!
Such a good post and good twit again nice one.....
This is a pretty sound argument, if not an epiphany. I feel like people get so caught up in being right sometimes, when everyone can be right or wrong based on the values behind a statement. What this means to me is that acceptance, respect, and understanding that others can possess different view points than myself is the main focus.
What's right for me may not be right for someone else, and that's alright. Great post~
Hi @lukestokes et al
In the age of Internet and Big Media I find more people believe we've all had a homogenized set of inputs and any deviation should be ignored. Some even think that is for the greater good. Others think if everyone or at least themselves, that the experience / input is less valid.
Until we understand that those differences are allowed and good, the expetation we should all view the Universe the same will discount those with alternate views.
Allowing for different, dissenting views is important. Of course, I'm learning that it needs to be in an unforced way as well.
Interviewers want to ask for out of the box thinkers, but i wonder how many corporate types really want that?
It is true, great post. When of the biggest problems we have in society is that people truly believe there is one right answer. The biggest word I hear being abused is "logical". Usually when people appeal that there argument is the logical one what they are really saying is that based on their perception, values, and experience it is the right one. For instance, if you support organics it is logical for healthier food and protecting the environment, but if you support industrial ag it's logical because it makes more money and easier short-term. Most arguments are really just different values and epistemology shooting past each other with the classic "sound and fury, signifying nothing".
Very good point.
If we consider the amount of knowledge (or data) out there and how limited the human brain is at processing that data, it's basically like streaming the ocean through a tap faucet. We also have to consider that each individual views the world through a lens of personal bias, which is based on their individual experience. The environment influences an individuals perspective to the point where two individuals can perceive the same even differently.
I believe that in a previous post you discussed the possibility that there is no such thing as a universal truth (big T)? If this idea is correct, then it doesn't really make sense to even try to determine who's idea is right or wrong, but rather to understand each others perspective and possibly find a common ground that works for everyone.
Great message.
Hi Luke! Another well thought out post. "can't we all just get along!" Now that goes back a long ways to our childhoods. -Rodney King. I'm sure you remember that quote. I was listening to a program the other day, they talked about how many people now a days form their opinions based on emotion, not even realizing it. They think it's logic, but it's really emotion. I think this way of being often makes societies across the world lack reason and common sense. But then maybe I should look in the mirror! After all I'm the crazy who's been living out of a backpack for most his adult life! lol. Hope you are well my friend. I'll be around. -Dan
Definitely! I think the trick is to disagree with someone, and be okay with the fact that they disagree with the fact that you disagreed with their opinion. Most people get offended one way or the other when it happens. In the end, we have to realize that what we believe to be true in our own belief!
I'm opposite to what ever you say just for fun.
Being agnostic and a free thinker I tend to have opposing views to many I come across but I always seem to try and overcome that with love kindness and an attempt to explain my beliefs in a rational and gentle way. I think we should agree to listen to one another and research together and discuss results and use our own rational judgments to form an opinion. Here is my #discussion post.
I like your post. @lukestokes I have followed you
Yes to see that life is actually more interesting with some disagreement and that opinions consistently change as well. Most of us now would probably disagree with a lot we had to say 10 or 20 years ago. It makes sharing challenging for all of us when we disrespect each other and condemn an entire person, class, race, religion, etc. based on differences of truth and opinion. Thank you for sharing this today!
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