My fellow educator, do not try to bring wisdom to your child or prevent him from failing after doing something. All you have to do is give your child an opportunity to stamp out the real world life in order to pick his own wisdom contained from every action he does.
Do not ever block your child from discovering his or her own experience, even if the experience is painful, because in essence your child should feel the real life to take lessons from him. But even so, we certainly do not need to be asserted again here should not be removed our children are constantly mired in mistakes. Because mistakes are too frequent to make children always feel afraid to fail and will never dare to try to overcome problems that arise in life.
Often we fail to give freedom to choose for our children because we always think the way we have is the best. And Honorable we are stuck in the pressure to control our child in the soonest possible time. In fact, every opportunity that we give to the child to choose and act, no matter how small the opportunity we plant it, it actually extinguish the fire of rebellion that is in our children.
Educator advice that can be delivered here is ...
Do not cram your child with everything we want, changing to eliminate errors that a child can take may take a relatively long time. Know that the little time that we put together at this time can prevent us from unnecessary infighting that can happen in the future. Because of the few opportunities given to the child to choose the truth with few disputes that can happen.
Let's take a few examples to explain this problem:
When a mother wants to ask her child to tidy up the house, the mother's voice says, "Do you want to tidy up this tool with your mother, where you just fill all the items that are scattered to the original place or do you want to want a table? . " By giving the child the opportunity to choose a job that will order itself, parents have made the child like his choice. By choosing alone, the child will not feel that he is doing the job as a person who is older than him, besides of course free choice like that honed his ability in assume responsibility.
When the ability to assume responsibilities is well honed, especially when the child completes his job, surely it encourages the child to become more active in his work and his confidence grows stronger as well. Freedom is one of the main conditions for building creativity in children. Rules and fetters that we apply too much to children just make them always overwhelmed with fear when they have to talk or do.
Therefore, one of the conditions of good education is not to shackle children too hard so that they run away from responsibility. In addition, good education should also be accompanied by the belief that freedom of choice must improve the child's ability to make decisions.
As educators, what we must do is to help the child in an indirect way when the child is facing difficulties requiring intervention and recovery, but the arbitrary intervention only becomes a form of attack against the child, since it prevents the child from being able to do the golden opportunity experiment alone or take advantage of the various experiences that lie before his eyes.
As well as experience also fosters the spirit of adventurous and risk-taking and opportunities to discover new things in the child's life. Many of the parents who when interacting with children, they did not appreciate the existence of these children. Parents are sometimes so proud when their children never once denied their orders and never once did anything out of the will of parents. The parents thought that the attitude of their totally submissive children was evidence their success in educating!
In fact, what the parents do is nothing more than "burying alive" the child's personality with the strength of an empty iron hand of value so that it only leads to one of two bad things: 1) insubordination, if the child has a hard character ; or 2) an inferior attitude, if the child is mushy. Both of these things are equally broken.
In order for a child to grow psychologically and biologically, he must think of feelings of freedom and independence, and must have the feeling that he has the ability to do all his personal affairs independently and without the help of others. All these things are the most appropriate entrance for the emergence of confidence in the child who in the next stage will bear the ability of children to assume various forms of responsibility in the future.
As parents and educators, when we decide what children should do, sometimes we push them away without any feeling to believe that "if the people who educate us always ask what we should do, which arose when we did an act, became their fault ... "
Yet if it is such a feeling that appears in our children, they certainly will never have the passion to assume responsibility even the slightest thing. Every child must have hidden potential within them. And there is no other way that we can use to explore this potential other than by training them in developing certain responsibilities and tasks, to see what they do .
We should all make room for our children to move freely ... to train them to assume responsibility and perform certain tasks while we direct them from a distance so that their personalities can flourish and all the hidden potential within them can surface . And in turn, it will alleviate the Muslim generation from the negative stigma as a nation as backward as we have been.
Teach kids responsibilities early, It pays off in the long run. Simply put, do you want a child spoiled rotten and always asks for handouts?? I didn't think so, Show them the value of money but in return also show them that loyalty comes before money. Never sell out your family member or sell yourself for money i believe that's one of the biggest lessons you could teach them at any age.