A colleague messaged me out of the blue checking up on how I was doing and it made think about what the fuck I've been doing lately. For context, I've been unemployed since January from profession as a physician and I'm in no hurry of coming back to the labor force to work. I just saved enough funds to afford being lazy and have 1st world problems for more than a year. There's job security in this profession so I'm all fine at the moment but time is ticking and I should have made progress in figuring out what to do with life. This is a shitpost disguised as a journal by the way so if you're expecting entertaining content, your time is spent somewhere else but here.
But for those that like to read my ramble, you're welcome to stay as this is a letter to a future self when I'm on a streak to review what I've been doing with my life. Yes, I check my old posts from years a back here, there is no better self torture than looking at your old posts and cringe.
It's comforting to have a colleague at your former workplace message asking when you'd be coming back and they still want you around and this is genuine stuff because they have less incentives to care. I previously thought I wasn't the crowd favorite in the office due to my noticeable aversion to gossip which was like a social currency.
Now I just thought my social standing wasn't so bad at all. Anyway, the TL:DR version why it was a mutual separation was my superiors noticing I wasn't giving my best because I performed poor or average on a regular basis but manage to score within the top 10 at the national levels when it really mattered. Translation, it just looked like I was lazy when it comes to doing the daily mental work and it's true.
As a resident in a specialized training, our priority should be studying for our field and less about other stuff. But this generation and the trend of promoting a work life balance got in the way which made me distracted on what I really wanted to do during training so it ended up me not giving my best and just floating around.
When you're surrounded by people that excel at their work, even if you passed the exams, the gap in results makes it look like you're failing. It also doesn't make me look good that my mentors were national level consultants in terms of fame. Looking back, it was really not that hard to excel, but I was still at a phase when I wanted to discover other skills sets (I still do) in life which makes topics like investing, financial literacy, marketing, freelance digital art, bookkeeping, transcription and translation jobs more appealing than the dull hospital work I get stressed by.
I'm fully aware that me getting unemployed was a calculated loss and take full responsibility for it. By calculated, I did saved up for a scenario where I get laid off work and lived cheap enough to be a bum just enough for one and half a year. I could still afford doing nothing until next year and there's job security in being a doctor in this country so I'm just stuck with a first world problem of having so much free time to figure what I want to do with my life.
It's not exactly something I can readily discuss with peers because they got their jobs and probably figured out what they want to do in life so I'm on my own in this situation. For the past few months since January, I have indulged in a cycle of lazy to productive streaks exploring new things because now I had more time to do what I want. Now it just feels like having no direction and I want to have a job to fill that empty void.
I don't know if I just want the security or routine or it's really just trying to rationalize some direction I should be in. Getting a job is part of the plan but the type of job is the question, I could just abandon my entire health care service background, toss more than a decade's worth of studying in exchange for a job that's less stress free and still pay equal if not more than what I could be earning as a doctor. What's worse is that I'm pressured to answer this soon because opportunities can come and go it's just a matter of how long the intervals last.
Thanks for your time.
I think I can relate to this, although with a more humble financial security (can survive a year of no work if I only eat rice and egg every meal, lol).
At first the freedom was amazing, you can do anything or nothing at all to your heart's content. It's like escaping the shackles which hold everybody else.
But later on, I felt lost and with no sense of purpose. I yearned for something familiar - a routine, a direction to help me get back on track.
So here I am, back to work and groaning everytime my alarm goes off. Lol. But it's nice to be back.
I hope you will realize what you really want soon.
I felt this the first 2 weeks then it waned fast after the first month. It's like a long vacation that I wanted to end because years worth of working habits deteriorated fast.
I think I'm heading to this place sooner that I thought at the end of the last month of the 3rd quarter probably.
At some point, you will just feel somewhat empty despite having food, nice things, comfort and convenience.
Like you miss interacting with people.
Yeah, first world problem. At least I had the chance to get a glimpse of what it was. 😂
Cheers to a sense of purpose and fulfilment 🥂
Get married to the cool, rich gal whose family owns the hospital. You won't be leaving the medical field AND still learn/do other things like investing, trading and growing businesses; since your future wife's family values these skills highly, you won't get bored with just routine hospital work.
I want this too but it's a tough market to get into.
Yeah. A bit of luck will really help you out with this goal. 😎
Why don't you apply abroad in a country where work-life balance is being considered. With only 8 hrs work, not more than that. Less stress, but pay more than you earn in the Ph .
I'm entertaining it but can't visualize it concretely yet.
There will always be that colleague who is concerned about how are we doing while on leave. I could relate to this but yours is a different situation. Sana all, kaya pa in a year and a half to keep away from the workforce. But I believe okay Rajud Kaayo coz you could finance yourself, and still be single and available. So carry rajud kaayo, you can do all you want like what you have mentioned to be skilled with this and that. Enjoy your choice and keep safe!
Thanks Pink, I think I'm close to settling for an answer and these new experience while on vacation have been helpful in sealing the deal.
Nah, stay here and shitpost all the time!
Or do both with time management!
View or trade
BEER.Hey @enforcer48, here is a little bit of
BEERfrom @isnochys for you. Enjoy it!Did you know that <a href='https://dcity.io/cityyou can use BEER at dCity game to buy cards to rule the world.
Thank you for your witness vote!
Have a !BEER on me!
To Opt-Out of my witness beer program just comment STOP below
or that colleague missed you getting the work done. lol.
from my shitty experience hmm... it is as you said.
you will eventually get tired having no routines, and you will want to get back.
This, that's why it's been a cycle of trying to get something productive done vs fighting the urge and just be chill.
I was never in your situation so as a friend, I'd suggest that you stay here nalang and create contents, do your trading etc. Kaso saying din yung years nang pag-aaral, why not become a freelance doctor? May ganun ba dito? Like tatawagin lang pag kailangan?
Moonlighting yung term dito and lucrative rin, most doctors that don't go into residency or quit residency use this method to earn and think about life. I would have done it too but there are great risks involved that's why we train more than risks being a generalist and losing our licenses. Some people are rather bold at handling these situations so good for them.
Ohhh I see that is why there's an FB page na moonlighting doctor that travels a lot sa post nya.
Honga! Whatever works for you beshywap support kita basta may time ako to spare 😏
Medics are always respected and in demand around the world. We always have a shortage in UK. Get your bum on a flight and come on over!!!!!
I want to travel abroad but not visualizing the experience as work related. I did entertain thoughts about working in Japan, that's why I looked up how to learn JP language but as a caregiver or English teacher. Thanks for stopping by!
I think the best way to know the type of the job you can take is mowing your interests and going for the best
That’s surely going to help you out
Congratulations @adamada! You have completed the following achievement on the Hive blockchain And have been rewarded with New badge(s)
Your next target is to reach 7250 replies.
You can view your badges on your board and compare yourself to others in the Ranking
If you no longer want to receive notifications, reply to this comment with the word
STOP