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That could honestly be why my ass is so itchy all the time. I'm surprised this never crossed my mind. It's so obvious now! Thank you, doctor!

It's going to be a long road but there is hope for a full recovery. Just apply the white powder to the affected areas once daily to accelerate the healing process.

How in the hell do you expect me to snort something up my ass? Should I avoid coughing afterwards? How much is too much?

Just divide your normal dose by 100 and apply that topically. If you cough, repeat the process. The first sign its working is when all bleeding stops including the burst veins in your optical sclera (the white part of your eyes).

My eyes have a white part? Since when?