HOMER J. SIMPSON is my spirit animal!

in #funny7 years ago (edited)

Laziness is what distinguishes the happy man from the stressed one. However, as in all things that give massive amounts of happiness, laziness is bad because it gives dependence. It begins with a nap after lunch at the kindergarten and you think you can stop at any time. Then you end up sleeping in the office bathroom for not being discovered by your boss. As experts suggest about any addiction, the best thing to do is take notice of the problem and then enjoy your drug until it destroys you.
Let's find out if your laziness is getting worse.



  1. The only thing that makes you get out of bed in the morning is a full bladder.

  2. Once in your room there were clothes thrown around everywhere. Today is all in order because I never change outfit.

  3. After stretching to take things without getting up from the couch your fingers look like ET's.

  4. The only thing you never leave is your smartphone because with it you can change channels on TV, order food and experience intense social experiences that are full of satisfaction.

  5. Your goal in life was to be a baby carried around on a stroller or carried, washed, fed and thoughtless. You currently have no other goals.

  6. In fact, if the adult diaper was socially accepted you would wear it in this very moment.

  7. The most frustrating phrase in any language is "Out of service elevator".

  8. Life is like a train, passes only once. If it doesn’t stop at the couch station it is lost.

  9. Before eating you apply a transparent film between dish and food. Then throw the film away and you do not have to wash the dish.

  10. Every morning you wake up and type on Google: "how to make money from home".

  11. You cannot explain yourself how you managed to get up early and go to school for all those years.

  12. When you hear the word party from your friends you fake your own death.

  13. You start believing in karma, because it is handy to have someone who take revenge in your place.

  14. You are always attracted to small villages where there is nothing to do.

  15. Better drive 90 minutes looking for spot for you car, near where you have to go for a walk.

  16. After the sloth, your spirit animal is Homer J. Simpson.

  17. Every time you go out of the house you relive the birth experience. That is, crying, the light hurts your eyes and on your body there are the signs of the nine months you spent at home.

  18. Just for the sake of ending a conversation ASAP you agree with everybody.

  19. Long hair and long beard are not style, is laziness at its peak.

  20. If there was a laziness award, for sure you wouldn’t waste time filling in the subscription documents.

And at last, you envy your grandma for leaving in a nursery home!



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love it

"Before eating you apply a transparent film between dish and food. Then throw the film away and you do not have to wash the dish." Brilliant !

True story this one actually :) my room mate at Uni was doing that!!

Haha, this gave me a much needed laugh. Great stuff man! Beard on!