A priest, a blonde, and a talking horse walk into a bar. They sit down and the bartender says, "What is this, some kind of a joke?"
Here I go thinking again.
I thought I would liven up my page with a bit of humor,
some 'comic relief' as it's called,
and while I didn't have anything particularly funny to write about,
being in an exceptionally foul mood,
my research suggested that I'd better start cracking some jokes around here, pronto.
I could go on and on with this intro, but studies show that such elaborate introductions to a joke might spoil the gag. The joke is a fragile thing, and can easily be crushed under the weight of expectations.
I've thus come to understand that "This will be one of the funniest jokes that you've ever heard" is not the best way to begin. I get that.
A great headline, they say, will draw attention to your post.
Sometimes I get great ideas for posts in the middle of the night, but last night I woke up, sat up, and actually wrote down the headline 'Don't Use This Headline'.
How hilarious would it be to use that as a headline!?
Damned hilarious, I thought.
So I used the headline, and now that we are all set up for some quality comedy here, it's time to start whipping out the humor. I might not want to use the 'funny' tag for this, since the post might not be funny to anyone else, and again, 'I'm about to tell a joke' is not really ideal as a setup for comedy.
A comedian might even say; "Paul, please stop using the 'funny' tag on your posts." I get it.
I'm using the 'funny' tag at great risk, I know. Sidesplitting laughs, guffaws and chuckles might be expected, while again, we don't want to put the cart before the horse. I risk getting hilariously flagged to death by the actual comedians here by using the 'funny' tag for this post as it is, so my 'joke' had better be good.
I did my research.
I found the oldest joke in the world, and everyone has heard it, yet it always gets a laugh.
It doesn't matter where you come from, or what your key values are in life, this one delivers, and instead of setting it up with an elaborate introduction, I will just let it out here:
Fart.
thanks for reading and laughing so hard at my humor. Open a window, upvote with all of your might, and maybe this post will clear the room after a minute or two. For more things that are not funny in the least, click below these birds, but do watch your step down there:
hahah that is epic to start the day off with lolzzzz
Well, the oldest joke DOES work, lol.
Thanks for the fun!
You are welcome!
I am upvoting the magic! I just wanted to add that I don't fart! Never! I don't even shit! There is only gold, precious stones and parfum coming out of my ass!
I swear.
Your words are also jewels, and your breath must be like swirling laughing gasses, forming giggles where there were once only frowns.
Well I definitely laughed. Actually I'm laughing more now :) I like the first one too, especially the picture, but the last is definitely a classic.
I made up that joke at the top, but I suck at telling jokes, so I hardly ever bother sharing. The joke at the bottom is not mine. I swear.
You made that up? Well hell, that's better than I could ever do! FART is about my speed, lol ;)
Well, this post still made me laugh. :)
Awesome! I knew that was a good joke, works every time, they say. ;)
Hey! This was funny! ...but now it smells in here.
Why are you looking at me like that? It wasn't me. Honest. Mine don't smell like that.
No it was mine, I dealt it. I dunno, it was dismal weather, frowns were everywhere and then 'poot', whole new atmosphere!
That is a very natural joke lol
And the talking horse answered, "Neeey."
haha that turns out to be all the horse ever says.
wow .. a very cute picture from my good friend .. and the picture of the person above your tu what is not my friend
It is silly isn't it? I'm not always serious.
you are invited to choose my posting one of my good friends
Posts that attract friends, it's a joke it is necessary to solve a quiet atmosphere, hopefully what is planned to run smoothly a friend
It is the oldest joke in the world, but still works nearly every time.
I laughed at this junction, trying not to be funny is somewhat funny, and the headline was a catcher.
Hope your mood has gotten better?
You made people smile today, take solace in that and allow yourself a slight smile or mild chuckle :)
It was my disclaimer, in case there was no humor found in the rest of the post! ;)
My mood has gotten better, always better after letting things out, allowing a sort of release.
Yeah, that's good to know...writing is a sort of therapy.
Three priests walk into a bar.
They're alcoholics.
Making a good headline is incredibly important and having a good picture is really important too.
It's hard sometimes getting people enticed.
I know that I usually can write the worst headlines possible. I'm finally getting better at making the title match the post, not be click-bait, and yet be enticing somehow, but I cringe at my headlines a lot when I look back! Sometimes I'll try to fix them with an edit, but usually I move forward. With today's image, I saw no point in trying to make the image good, it was drawn badly as another form of comedy that I'm still working on here. ;)
its a funny one and when I see a picture it looks like all are enjoying farting and especially that man as look at his eyes and he may be felt that he was the one who actually doing it instead of a horse.
I see what you mean, he does have that face, like the guilty one.
Haha! What are you talking about, man!? You always bring the funny! I'm surprised you aren't considered more as a humorist. I think 70% of your posts are hella funny! With the remaining 29% as serious thought provoking stuff.
I don't know what I'm considered to be, really. I always wanted to make a humor magazine like MAD or something, but then I also write the thought-y stuff. Mix those two together, and you get my page!
So prepared for the joke, I didn't laugh. But that's OK. I don't write much humor myself.
When I do, I only use jokes that make me laugh and I used my own jokes when I did standup comedy for a time. But I can tell you that humor is one of the hardest things to write. It takes a special gift and not very many people have it.
I once knew a visionary. His name was Seymore.
There, that is my joke. It was tested on a relative a few days ago. It worked, and he laughed. But it may not work here.
Have a laugh today.
Yep, I spent so much time in my intro talking about how easily a gag can be ruined with too much introduction, that it took the wind out of the wind.
There were a few things about this post that made me laugh, so it easily passed my approval as comedy, for what that's worth!
Seriously though, thanks for looking.
Write on. :)
Nice
a very nice painting, very good post, if there is a chance please visit my blog once, I will upvote and resteem your blog.
Yeah, you might want to read the text of this post before you resteem so freely. Oh but I'm supposed to do what to get an upvote from you? Can you define your rules a bit better? I'm confused because normally we don't comment on another's post without reading it, and we certainly don't show up at posts offering deals for upvotes. And it's not a "very nice painting" if you look at it a bit closer. My signature is horse poo! Are you still sure that you want me to come and visit your blog?
wow .. a very funny picture of my good friend .. and the picture of the person above your tu what is not my friend
this picture looks very cute, nice bland comrade hopefully much support and fast entry trending