Haha, I knew you'd understand. I was close to getting into therapy before we left Holland but then we made a bold last minute move and left. For me, getting out of the situation and environment was the absolute most important thing. Without that, staying there, even with tons of therapy, I would have never been able to heal at all.
I cried for years, with extreme emotional outbursts first, as the pain needed to get less heavy, but writing has helped me get through that better than any antidepressant. I had them, some years ago, but they were not my go to. I also saw how they can be extremely bad om someone's mood if they are not the right type and now I refrain from any prescription meds unless I absolutely need to. Such as these for my blood pressure (was dangerously high for a while).
These temporarily moments of sadness, pain, anger etc, sometimes make me go back in time to the point where I have flashbacks, but yet I still sometimes choose to get to that point as it seems I feel that it's needed to get out of some sort of mental block, if that makes sense :)
There's no right or wrong in my opinion to get over these things, everyone walks their own path, in their own shoes, and I only encourage people to try out writing, creating art to help themselves heal (if only a bit) as I think many of us lost their creative soul in hard times. I know I did. When I was young I was always creating things, doodling, drawing, painting etc.. I was super creative.. When the trauma years were there, I did none of these things. I only realized years after getting out of there, that I lost that part of me, I didn't allow it to be there. When I welcomed it back, I started to feel better... sometimes we need a reminder..
<3