Here is a video from one of my favorite narcissist experts, Dr. Ramani... followed by some of my experience of workplace narcissism.
It does seem to be a super common problem.
Since returning to the workplace 2 years ago, I've run into many.
Job 1 - Supermarket in Northern Wisconsin
The narcissistic upper management began expanding the corporation (from a small town family-owned cooperative)... buying out supermarkets in nearby (and not-so-nearby) towns... seemingly forgetting about those of us who helped make it happen to begin with. The upper two or three levels of management were often not in the building when I took calls for them - often not even knowing whether they were there - or when they'd be back... Before I left, a wave of good employees left... as I left another wave left... and after I left another one left... I honestly don't know who remains there to run it now.
Job 2 - agricultural chain store in Wisconsin and Michigan
I worked for the district, not the store, so my position was an interesting mesh of the managers being above me, but not above me...
Manager 1 - was a good, hands-on manager, but definitely had some major narcissistic traits that would come out whenever confronted. However, if you did your job well, you wouldn't have much trouble... but he wasn't married and that was probably a good thing.
Manager 2 - had been fired from multiple supervisory jobs from other stores... Not sure why she became a manager. She was very toxic and took out her position on her staff... She would then shape up whenever I was there - because she knew that I was a threat. I have heard that she's not much better now.
Manager 3 - probably the best manager I worked with. Very nice, not narcissistic... but his assistant is very narcissistic and snarky. He has caused multiple good employees to leave and was definitely one I mentioned by name to my supervisor when I left.
Manager 4 - very narcissistic. Professional (most of the time), but narcissistic. Didn't want to acknowledge that I provided more for him (in that he didn't have to pay my wage) than I took (by asking for assistance from his staff.) Even my supervisor knew he was an issue - though they both started their positions about the same time - less than a year before.
His assistant was a definite enabler, otherwise powerless most of the time. She also showed narcissistic traits, but was more of a flying monkey.
Job 3 - seafood restaurant
Already mentioned Manager C, who is definitely a narcissist. He loves his chaos, for sure. I am sure some of his corrections are correct, but the way he goes about it is very difficult to handle at times. I'm sure there are employees who have left because of him.
Manager B is an absolute dream though - and makes everything work. He is able to correct in a gentle way that gets the message across, but also the message that he has absolute confidence you can do the job.
As usual, I'm simply sharing a YouTube video - all rights remain with the original uploader.
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Lori Svensen
author/designer at A'mara Books
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