/. 我的限制 ENG/CN

见过马和塑料椅子吗？
这匹马的局限性只在于它的头脑。它的局限性完全在于它的感知，而不是基于现实。大多数人都是这样的，甚至包括我。障碍和限制远远多于精神上的，而不是身体上的。

Ever see the horse and the plastic chair?

pexels-yunus-tuğ-7952142.jpg
Pexels

This horse's limitations are only in its head. Its limitations are all in its perception and not based in reality. Most people are like this, even me. The barriers and limitations are far more mental than physical.```





believing that you can’t do something because you’re you is more likely an indicator that you’re self sabotaging. Again, this is something that pretty much all of us do to some degree or another, but I generally find it useful and effective to look at self sabotage and self       sabotaging behaviors. Here are some hints, I hope it at least gives you, and others, a good starting point.

相信你不能做某事，因为你是你自己，这更有可能表明你正在自我破坏。同样，这几乎是我们所有人在某种程度上都会做的事情，但我通常发现研究自我破坏和自我破坏行为是有用和有效的。这里有一些提示，我希望它至少能给你和其他人一个很好的起点。






People are afraid of success. For a lot of reasons.

Success creates vulnerability. Standing out in any way or to any degree opens the possibility of being attacked by others, who are threatened by the success of others and make it a personal point of virtue to tear others down.

They see themselves as undeserving. Most people see themselves as inherently flawed and 
undeserving

人们害怕成功。原因有很多。

成功会带来脆弱性。以任何方式或程度突出，都有可能受到他人的攻击，他们受到他人成功的威胁，并使击倒他人成为个人的美德。

他们认为自己不配。大多数人认为自己天生就有缺陷，并且
不值得

 of good things. Their poor self   image lines up with ideas that success and good things will be wasted on them, or that they just aren’t good enough for certain things.

好东西。他们糟糕的自我形象与成功和好事会浪费在他们身上的想法相一致，或者他们只是在某些事情上不够好。



They just know that certain people in their lives won’t tolerate success and, like crabs in a bucket, they will get pulled back in. They are afraid that their personal success will result in losing the approval of others. There are some people that will literally have to deal with someone in their life, like a parent, overtly tearing them down if they better their own situation.

他们只知道他们生活中的某些人不会容忍成功，就像桶里的螃蟹一样，他们会被拉回来。他们害怕自己的个人成功会导致失去别人的认可。有些人实际上将不得不与他们生活中的某个人打交道，比如父母，如果他们改善自己的处境，就会公开地把他们打倒。

Paradoxically, people are also afraid of failure. If they try to move past their limitations and seek success, they will fail. People are afraid of failure because

矛盾的是，人们也害怕失败。如果他们试图超越自己的局限，寻求成功，他们就会失败。人们害怕失败，因为：

They are afraid that others will see their failures, which also makes them feel extremely vulnerable. If others see their failures, then it seems like it will be catastrophic

他们害怕别人会看到自己的失败，这也让他们感到极度脆弱。如果其他人看到他们的失败，那么它似乎将是灾难性的。.

They falsely believe that failure is a shameful thing. That it will mean something about them, and they are afraid that if they fail it means that something will be true about them that they are afraid will be true and that is that the very fabric of their being is that they are a failure.

他们错误地认为失败是一件可耻的事情。這對他們來說意味著某種東西，他們害怕如果他們失敗了，這意味著他們身上的某件事會是真實的，他們害怕的東西會是真實的，那就是他們存在的結構是他們是失敗的。

The fear of success and failure at the same time usually results in paralysis, fear to move either way.

In summary:

对成功和失败的恐惧同时会导致瘫痪，害怕向任何方向前进。

综上所述：



Limitations are mental and a matter of perception more than they are real or concrete.

The anatomy of those limitations is self  sabotage, which most commonly comes in the form of fear. The fear of success and the fear of failure.

The solution:

限制是心理上的，是感知的问题，而不是真实或具体的。

这些限制的解剖结构是自我破坏，最常见的形式是恐惧。对成功的恐惧和对失败的恐惧。

解决方案：



Learn to validate yourself so that you will no longer be dependent, yes dependent, on validation like you might depend on a drug. Soothe that inner child by validating yourself, and learn to stop needing it from others.

学会验证自己，这样你就不会再依赖，是的，依赖于验证，就像你可能依赖药物一样。通过验证自己来安抚那个内在的孩子，并学会停止从别人那里得到它。

Care more about you and what you think more than what others think. Stop doing things and making decisions based on what you think what others will approve of. Approval from others is a prison. Learn to break out of it. As long as you’re afraid of losing approval, you’ll keep sabotaging yourself. Those who mind don’t matter, and those who matter don’t mind.

更关心你自己，你的想法比别人的想法更多。停止做事，不要再根据你认为别人会赞同的东西来做决定。别人的批准是一个监狱。学会打破它。只要你害怕失去认可，你就会继续破坏自己。那些介意的人不重要，那些重要的人不介意。

Be extremely careful about who you take advice from. Only take advice from people who are living the way that you want to live.

要非常小心你从谁那里接受建议。只接受那些以你想要的方式生活的人的建议。


Change your beliefs about failure and understand that the most successful people in the world aren’t successful because they haven’t failed, they are successful because they have failed. And because they are no longer afraid of Change your self-talk. Challenge your beliefs with words with your outward and inner dialogue. Even if you don’t believe them. “I am not a failure.” Say that. Out loud. Every day. Then change it to, “I am successful.”

改变你对失败的信念，明白世界上最成功的人不是因为他们没有失败，他们成功是因为他们失败了。而且因为他们不再害怕改变你的自我对话。用言语挑战你的信念，用你外在和内在的对话。即使你不相信他们。“我不是失败者。这么说吧。大声地。每天。然后把它改成“我很成功”。