A Little Back Story
My dad is a perfect example of a closed book. He barely speaks, or smiles or express his emotions.
He has a fixed routine. After getting retired from his job, for the last 7 years, he reads spiritual books in the day, spends his evening in the garden, watering plants, trees and flowers. Sleeps before nine and wakes up at five.
Most of the days, he has a poker face expression. You can't understand whether he is happy or sad, or frustrated about something.
But whenever he is around my nephew who is just 10 months old, he plays quite a lot with him. He smiles a lot.
Kids bring out the best in their grandparents. Even in the difficult ones.
I wasn't that lucky to play with my grandparents. Maybe they might have played with me when I was a baby but they were long gone before I could think or act consciously.
I don't remember exactly but I must be 6 or 7 when my grandfather died. My grandmother died a few years later but she was long gone before her death. I don't know what she was suffering from, maybe dementia or something. I was just told that grandma is ill. That's why she can't recognize you or anyone else for that matter.
We don't have many pics of them. Maybe just 2-3, that hangs in our old house where my uncle lives. Cameras were rare at that time and we were dirt poor to own any.
I can only remember a few glimpses of how they looked. A few fading memories.
My mom's parents died long before I was even born, couldn't know them either.
My dad isn't much talkative type. So, he never shared any stories from his childhood days, or about my grandparents life.
Maybe it's best to forget the family history. Or maybe there was never anything to remember. We were just farmers. Plain, hardworking, god fearing farmers.
The Lessons I learned from two of my Neighbours
Most of the lessons I have learnt in my life, I have learnt them from reading books.
There is a lot I have learned by observing people around me and two of my neighbours have taught me the best lessons.
Be happy and smile!
A few years ago, I thought all old people were grumpy, sick, and frustrated. Or maybe most of the people in my family who were old, have faces and behavior like that. They were frustrated from life, probably because they were poor.
But I noticed somewhat different behaviour in one of my neighbour.
He lives in a house on the backside of my house. Usually, strolling on his terrace in the evening, he is quite old to walk up the stairs but he still do that, almost daily. Talk about will and commitment.
He was retired and old when I was a small kid. So, he must be 80-90 years old now.
We don't talk much. He stays alone, don't have any kids or grandkids. His wife died about a decade ago.
Most of the people in our area are quite happy to see him.
The reason?
He always smile whenever he see someone. He always have a happy and smiling face.
Whenever we see each other from our terrace, we smile and wave at each other.
It was just a normal thing.
One day I was a little bit frustrated with my life. I was walking on my terrace, lost deep in my thoughts. My face was clearly frustrated with all the troubles I was facing. Then, I noticed my neighbour. He smiled and waved at me, saying hello.
I smiled and waved back at him.
Then he asked with a thumbs up, is everything okay?
I replied with a thumbsup, yepp, all good!
No words were spoken, yet it changed the rest of my day. My mood was lightened. I was no more angry, or frustrated just because of a small generous gesture from a neighbour.
That day, I realized that smiling is powerful tool. A little smile on your face can make you happy for a while, regardless of what's going in your life. It might improve someone's day.
That's the attitude I will have when I am old. And I usually have the same attitude whenever I meet someone. I welcome them with a smile on my face, even if my day is going bad. Who knows, it might make someone happy to see a smiling face 😃
Work for other's happiness and prosperity
I have another neighbour who taught me many valuable lessons.
He and my dad had similar beginnings. Both were quite poor. Both moved out of their hometown with empty pockets to change their life circumstances.
Both worked a job for 30+ years. Retired.
While my dad stopped after getting retired, my neighbour did not.
My neighbour was doing good financially, both of his kids had a well paying job. He could have stopped too.
Instead, he chose to do something spectacular. He chose to start a new chapter in his 60's.
He had already changed his life. Provided good education to his children. Both of his sons are software engineers. Earning good money. Well settled in their life.
But he realized that his cousins, brothers and rest of his family were still poor. They could not get a job like him. They were struggling.
So, he risked all his savings to start a small business. Not for himself but for others.
Not to earn more money but to help people in his family stand on their feet.
Seven years later, he and most of his family and friends make more than a million dollars a year. They own more than a dozen factories. Have 100's of employees.
They still live a humble life, in the same average neighbourhood when they can live in any part of the town.
They have helped hundreds of people with their kids education, with people's medical bill, or anyone who is in genuine need. Been a helping hand for people who lost their jobs during the lockdown.
While the lesson here could be → you are never too old or too late to be rich or successful, I see a deeper lesson here.
The lesson I learned from him is → don't be completely focused on just yourself. Do something for others. Contribute to other's welfare, happiness. Do something to improve other people's life.
Do things for others, it will give you more happiness than you can ever imagine.
Always be more focused on giving than receiving.
There is always a lesson to be learned from other's life. Specially from old people.
Young people like me who are struggling with the concept of life, and trying to pick up a better mindset can learn a lot from old people who have decades of experience in life.
I learned from old people in my family, to never be always frustrated or grumpy. It will drive away your family. It drives away people.
I learned a lesson from a neighbour, to always smile and be happy. Not only, it will lift your spirits but can improve someone's day.
I learned a lesson from another neighbour that even at old age, when people are thinking about how to stay healthy and wealthy, and avoid risks, or be absorbed in worries about their children's career and finances, to think about others who are not doing well.
To do something for others. To contribute to others happiness and prosperity!
Thanks @galenkp for organising this contest. I got to think about crucial lessons I have learned from old people around me in my life.
If you want to participate in this contest, you can see the details about contest here: Grandparent stories: Posting contest - 145 hive to win
When seniors talk I'm two ears and one mouth.
I do that too, but with almost everyone.
Not much a fan of talking. I am more of listener.😅
I wanted to stop by and deliver a personal thank you message. There was 50 something of these entries, yours was one of the ones that deserved special attention. I wrote a note next to yours that said "neighbor got rich by dumping life savings into a community market."
Excellent entry, thank you.
Hey, thanks a lot. I enjoyed writing that post, and being part of an awesome contest.
Also, got to know a new community that I can post in, and engage with other people. That was a win win for me. Thanks a lot😃
Excellent. That was the whole purpose of the contest. 👍🏿
A smile is so powerful - and it is amazing how he continues to share it for surely if he wanted to, he could find something to be grumpy about.
And your second lesson, I find people who live their lives focused on others are in a happier place.
Sorry, you did not get to know your grandparents or at least in happier times, but the Universe brought along some "experienced' folks and the best part is, you saw and you learnt :D
Thanks.
True. I really believe there is something to learn from everyone. Young, old. Successful, failure. Happy or sad.
There are dozens even hundreds of lessons in every human being.
Thanks for reading my post🙂
It was a pleasure :D
The way you’ve highlighted a seemingly small detail, such as a smile, a look brings to the forefront how important small every day little acts are. How they alter another’s life quite profoundly and ripple outwards.
This is a way of being that adds such richness and depth to one’s experience in life. It’s far more satisfying to weight the balance towards giving than receiving.
Excellent post! I enjoyed it very much.
Thanks a lot.
Things like these has made me believe that small genuine actions matters more than big ideas/thoughts.
So, I am always focused on small actions, progress, or small acts of kindness than going once or twice really big.
Thanks for reading my post🙂
From my perspective and experience, they most certainly do.
This, yes, I couldn't agree more.
I really enjoyed your post, you're welcome!
As a migrant I grew up with very little grand-parent time - it's a luxury so many people didn't get.
I loved your way of viewing neighbours as basically extended family.
Thanks.
I am sure, I will find some old(not age but been active from start) wise people on hive to learn from. Maybe view them as my extended family😅