In a considerable departure from the isolation we have been observing since late February, this weekend we've had our adult children from Seattle staying with us for the Memorial Day holiday... representing pretty much the first social anything we've had going on on several months.
In some ways, it was a tiny signal of "normalcy."
I'm not sure whether it was triggered by current events in the world, but we've spent a lot of time reminiscing and telling slightly nostalgic stories of times and events of days gone by.
Time Traveling is a Funny Thing...
One of the things I have noticed about "time traveling" to the proverbial old days is that it's an activity that really only works when it's kept inside our heads.
No matter how good our intentions may be, actually physically going to places we used to know — at some point in our pasts — just isn't the same thing as just sharing stories about them.
When my mother died — more than a decade ago, now — and I visited places I had not seen since my teens, I came to realize that the issue isn't with the places, themselves... but with the fact that we are not the people we were when the original memories were formed. As such, where we stand and what we look at may appear right on some level, but the intervening years will invariably have changed how we feel, as we stand there.
Movies tend to romanticize these sorts of flashbacks in a way that almost never can be experienced in "real life."
The street I used to walk down to get to the school bus when I was 15 looked the same, yet it felt like any other street, or a scene from a movie I didn't remember.
What Will We Remember From NOW?
As we shared old stories on the back porch earlier today, I wondered to myself what we might remember about the first half of 2020, when we find ourselves looking back on this moment from 2045?
Will be be laughing, because so much we were "afraid" of was turned out to be little more than a hoax, perpetuated by the media?
Or will we look back and wax nostalgic because life was so much "easier" then, than it went on to become?
Providing I'm still alive — I'd be 85 in 2045 — I'll perhaps remember busting my butt (and having the physical ability to do so) building our vegetable garden so we could feed ourselves, because "what if the distribution channels break down and there is no food?"
Perhaps I will remember the local "tradition" that it always seems to rain over Memorial Day Weekend. 2020 appears to be no exception...
25 Years the Other Way....
When I look back to 1995, it was a difficult time. My ex and I were recently separated; my business was about to declare bankruptcy and I was struggling with some pretty serious mental health issues, as I muddled my way through a complex and expensive divorce.
I was living in central Texas and hating the summer heat, determined to "someday" relocate to the Pacific Northwest (which I eventually did) if only I could get to a point where life no longer cost more than I seemed capable of earning.
Sadly — compared to today — I was actually better off, back then.
The only significant positives I can immediately pinpoint was being part of an exciting new "frontier" called the Internet... and being part of a project that was examining the question of what the concept "here" means, in the context of the web. Our brains were being stretched. What does "here" mean, in the context of a web chat room?
It cost me $400-500 a month for Internet service, based on my number of hours of usage!
I think about this, and where we are today, and then consider where we are now with social blockchain projects like Hive... and then speculate on where will we be in 2045?
Will blockchain and cryptocurrencies have become the truly world changing disruptive technology we think it is? Or will they have already gone the way of 8-track tapes and floppy disks?
Gratitude
Regardless of where we might end up — and where we are now — we all decided that there's a lot to have gratitude for.
It's easy to look at everything that is scary and wrong with the world, and forget that there are also lots of good and positive things, happening all around us. We tend to zero in on things that are wrong, but how much is really wrong?
And we paused for a moment to remember older relatives who were in military service in the past; a relative of Mrs. Denmarkguy who was the one-millionth man to join the US Air Force; her late father who was on a US Navy ship during the attack on Pearl Harbor...
And then, we were simply grateful that we could spend the weekend together.
Thanks for reading, and have a great rest of your weekend!
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Created at 20200524 22:06 PDT
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It is quite a powerful thing to go back in time 10, 20 years and to realise how much you've grown as a person. And yes, places change their symbolism because we change. Going through a divorce and a failed business must have felt horrible, but look at you now writing about it here and being at peace with it. The passing of time can make us nostalgic, but I would be cautious with nostalgia. We must also keep nostalgia deeply rooted in realism and not romanticise due to passing of time. I like the photo with the leaf, it might be a metaphor for us as people, going through the seasons of life and accepting changes.
Thanks for the thoughtful comment @creativemary! I am much at peace with the turbulence of the past, and these days mostly worry about navigating the turbulence of the present.
Writing has served as a really good healing tool, over the years... I find I can work through a lot of issues and problems, in writing.
I can relate to you, writing solved a lot of issues for me too.
Why do you say you were better off back then when you were living in Texas? It seems you've grown rich in family and thoughtfulness since then.
Yes, please, let's find the good, and focus far less on fear.