Hi, @otherbrandt here.
I am happy to report that me and my always belligerently drunk yet never unbeloved little Subaru, Yolo McFukitol, are both still alive and well and kickin' it with great enthusiasm and responsibly reckless abandon out here in our home sweet woods.
Just in case you were actually wondering about us. We still aren't dead.
And as 100% alive and well beings, we were recently encamped up in the San Isabel National Forest near Poncha Springs, Colorado, exploring some new terrain and enjoying much wine, women, and song minus the much women and of course wasting a few precious hours of our temporary and maddeningly fast speeding and fleeting lives, by picking up litter left behind by others who apparently had too many people to see, things to do, and places to be, to be bothered with the time-consuming act of bending over and back up again.
So, we did it for them.
And behold, here are all the discarded treasures of trash that we discovered:
Right off the bat we were looking at several rusty old cans of sluggard and sloth preserves. Tasty of course but you are what you eat, as they say.
I think the one on the left is actually an old can of jackass jam. I've personally never had any of that but I've heard it's pretty delicious and also wildly addictive.
I assume this is the one someone decided to smash on their forehead. What a stud.
I was quickly getting bored of the rusty old can theme, so it was nice to see other varieties of litter out there. Here we have the happy plastic wreckage of an experimental mass surveillance spy drone. I'm gonna see what I can get for this on eBay.
Common Colorado garter snake, dead. Most likely shot by a cop for being the wrong color.
Tiny magnifying glass. Glass no longer included.
Can of studliness jelly. Clearly shotgunned.
Some sort of dead plastic thing? Not sure how these guys keep winding up so far away from the ocean where they obviously belong.
That's a Pacific starfish if I've ever seen one. I wonder if these might actually get picked up by waterspouts and carried this far east?
Broken glass in a firepit. Classic find right there.
And of course it wouldn't be the San Isabel National Forest without at least one chunk of asphalt shingle sitting there all pretty under the asphalt tree.
So there you go, that's the whole haul from Cleanup #11.
As you can see I decided to stack it for some reason. I don't know why I did that, but I'm glad I did because apparently I'm really good at stacking.
Sweet stack BRO! That dead snake's quite a distance from the sea too, they must've washed in together.
Thanks! I'm stacking like crazy!
And you're probably right, they likely washed in together… have you considered a job in weather forecasting?
!PIZZA
I have not. Thank you!
Got anymore genius suggestions up your stack?
Yeah have you heard of bitcoin? Brand new form of digital currency, it's def going places. Sell your house right now and invest.
Thank you!!
Just signed the deed. What a great week.
Yay! 🤗
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!PIZZA
You are good at stacking! Have your ever heard of crypto? I have heard that stacking is big there too.
Thank you! What's crypto? Maybe I should get into that!
!PIZZA
It's like knitting but with wool that you cannot see.
More !PIZZA
That sounds like a smashing investment opportunity! Here, I just knit you a stack of !PIZZA s :)
You ain't seen a stack of !PIZZA to you seen my stack of pizza!!
I think. Maybe.
Stack me some trash!!!
Yessir! Back to the woods I go for a crapload of trash stacking! !BEER
If you have !BEER them you will never tire of stacking!
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