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A few weeks ago I turned 33. It is said that many people involved in mystical activities leave this planet at this age, like Jesus did. I’m skeptical and I have faith at the same time. In my mind all is possible and I don’t deny any of the endless possibilities of this world. The ways I've practiced my personal mysticism are a bit out of the boundaries described by religions, yet I've always tried to figure out what they are trying to say.
Hace unas semanas cumplí 33 años. Se dice que muchas personas involucradas en actividades místicas abandonan este planeta a esta edad, como lo hizo Jesús. Soy escéptico y tengo fe al mismo tiempo. En mi mente todo es posible y no niego ninguna de las infinitas posibilidades de este mundo. Las formas en que he practicado mi misticismo personal están un poco fuera de los límites descritos por las religiones, sin embargo, siempre he tratado de averiguar qué están tratando de decir.
I don’t know if I’ve acted properly during my time on Earth. I’ve done my best, but has it been enough? If my 3D life was to end one of these days, what would I regret and what would I thank the most? I can't help thinking I've been following a path that might end any time now, because it has never been my intention to live a long, stable life, that ends with me inhabiting a frail and damaged body, clinging on to earthly attachments.
No sé si he actuado adecuadamente durante mi tiempo en la Tierra. He hecho todo lo posible, pero ¿ha sido suficiente? Si mi vida en 3D terminara uno de estos días, ¿de qué me arrepentiría y qué agradecería más? No puedo evitar pensar que he estado siguiendo un camino que podría terminar en cualquier momento, porque nunca ha sido mi intención vivir una vida larga y estable, que termine habitando un cuerpo frágil y dañado, aferrado a lo terrenal.
Yesterday I found out how much religious thought weights on my consciousness. How much I try to be more like Buddha, Jesus, Lao Tzu, even Krishna and Satan. While thinking about this, a little prose came to mind:
Ayer descubrí cuánto pesa el pensamiento religioso en mi conciencia. Cuánto trato de ser más como Buda, Jesús, Lao Tse, incluso Krishna y Satanás. Mientras pensaba en esto, me vino a la mente un poco de prosa:
Don’t be like Christ, take care of yourself
Don’t be like the Buddha, be enlightened
Don’t be like Lao Tzu, write your own story
No seas como Cristo, cuídate
No seas como el Buda, iluminate
No seas como Lao Tse, escribe tu propia historia
So there it is, the answer I need to go on. I’ve done nothing but written my own story. I’ve sinned in ways not described by any of the religious texts and I’ve performed miracles of which only those who were present and me will know about. I’ve allowed myself to balance out the sinner and the saint that dwell within me. I have no regrets, I am grateful for everything.
Así que ahí está, la respuesta que necesito para continuar. No he hecho más que escribir mi propia historia. He pecado de formas que no se describen en ninguno de los textos religiosos y he realizado milagros de los que solo sabremos los que estaban presentes y yo. Me he permitido equilibrar al pecador y al santo que habitan dentro de mí. No me arrepiento, estoy agradecido por todo.
I’ve never known much stability, Life has thrown me in multiple directions all the time and its been a crazy ride. I have learned things, lived by them and later destroyed them to open space for new experiences.
Nunca he conocido mucha estabilidad, la vida me ha arrojado en múltiples direcciones todo el tiempo y ha sido un viaje loco. He aprendido cosas, las he vivido y luego las he destruido para abrir espacio a nuevas experiencias.
The only thing I’ve been really consistent with is questioning this reality, trying to find out what I really enjoy, what it is that truly "delivers". And boy, have I been consistent with that. I’ve even made great sacrifices and leaps of faith with the very purpose of getting to know me better. On this day, I can safely say I’ve made some progress and that the pains are starting to pay off.
Lo único con lo que he sido realmente coherente es cuestionar esta realidad, tratar de descubrir qué es lo que realmente disfruto, qué es lo que realmente "satisface". Y uff, he sido coherente con eso. Incluso he hecho grandes sacrificios y saltos de fe con el mismo propósito de conocerme mejor. En este día, puedo decir con seguridad que he progresado un poco y que los dolores están comenzando a dar sus frutos.
I am beginning to embrace the idea that my religion is self-love. It seems selfish but it’s not. In the measure you love yourself more, you become a radiant force of love to what surrounds you. Sacrificing yourself for others will make you a puppet of their desires. Is that really what you want? Don’t you want to be an oasis of abundance in a world that has our throats and hearts already so dry?
Empiezo a aceptar la idea de que mi religión es el amor propio. Parece egoísta pero no lo es. En la medida en que te amas más a ti mismo, te conviertes en una fuerza radiante de amor hacia lo que te rodea. Sacrificarte por los demás te convertirá en un títere de sus deseos. ¿Es eso realmente lo que quieres? ¿No quieres ser un oasis de abundancia en un mundo que ya tiene la garganta y el corazón tan secos?
And yes, self-love is a painful process, probably a natural one as well. There are many who prefer to look for constant distractions: alcohol, movies, compulsive use of social media, food, etc. But at the end of the day, we all have a void to fill and how to do that is the very process of loving yourself.
Y sí, el amor propio es un proceso doloroso, probablemente también natural. Hay muchos que prefieren buscar distracciones constantes: alcohol, películas, uso compulsivo de las redes sociales, comida, etc. Pero al final del día, todos tenemos un vacío que llenar y cómo hacerlo es el proceso mismo de amarte a ti mismo.
There are times I’ve felt I really got the hang of it, when I’m flowing in conscious action, not giving two fucks about what will happen next or what happened before. But that usually lasts until I sleep and the next day I seem to forget what that feels like and how to enter that state again.
Hay momentos en los que he sentido que realmente lo entendí, cuando estoy fluyendo en acción consciente, sin importarme un carajo lo que sucederá después o lo que sucedió antes. Pero eso suele durar hasta que me duermo y al día siguiente parece que olvido cómo se siente y cómo volver a entrar en ese estado.
So perhaps self-love is an ongoing process that has to be worked on every day, from the moment you wake up until you sleep. Perhaps it could be extended if we were completely conscious of our perceptions when we sleep, but doing so has proven to be extremely hard, for me at least. I’ve only been able to achieve it a handful of times.
Así que quizás el amor propio es un proceso continuo en el que hay que trabajar todos los días, desde el momento en que te despiertas hasta que te duermes. Quizás podría extenderse si fuéramos completamente conscientes de nuestras percepciones cuando dormimos, pero hacerlo ha demostrado ser extremadamente difícil, al menos para mí. Solo he podido lograrlo un puñado de veces.
There are so many ways to practice self-love. From taking care of your physical aspect, being honest about the things that trouble you with others, meditating, cooking something that’s good for you, remembering the things you’re grateful for, it’s just infinite. But the real question is how to keep a steady and balanced awareness of this while you deal with the demands of Life? Big question, sorry I haven’t a clue on how to do it.
Hay tantas formas de practicar el amor propio. Desde cuidar tu aspecto físico, ser honesto sobre las cosas que te preocupan con los demás, meditar, cocinar algo que sea bueno para ti, recordar las cosas por las que estás agradecido, es simplemente infinito. Pero la verdadera pregunta es ¿cómo mantener una conciencia constante y equilibrada de esto mientras se ocupa de las demandas de la vida? Gran pregunta, lo siento, no tengo ni idea de cómo hacerlo.
How do you practice self-love? How do you remind yourself to do it? As always, glad to read you.
¿Cómo practicas el amor propio? ¿Cómo te recuerdas a ti mismo que debes hacerlo? Como siempre, encantado de leerte.
I think that you just do it. And not berate yourself and be dissatisfied with yourself, no matter what you do and have done, and no longer do what you don't like yourself and perceive things that have nothing to do with self-love and love.
Sounds right, less judgement and more acceptance.
So beautiful.
Self love is something I am learning about all the time, it gets be closer to who I really am and who I am becoming. It is not easy, but damn it is so rewarding.
I have really been listening to how I talk to myself, and what I choose to let into my world. They are important self love practices for me.
Sending you lots of Love xxxxxxx
That gives a looot to work on, but as you said its very rewarding 👌
Sending Love right back at you 💗
One of the most beautiful posts about self love I've read. It's a life long practice of connecting to the true self that is beyond ego...
I remember 33
. I have a photo of me at 33 and I look so young and innocent. Don't die lol... we NEED you on Earth. Just because you get old does not mean you become frail... and with your practice, you will become stronger in spirit.
Did you know @danielapevs has a self love challenge on? You should enter this..
HAPPY BIRTHDAY
Well, I’m not thinking of suicide so it’s not really my call, but thanks for saying I’m needed here, sometimes I have a hard time thinking that is so.
Hey, how about sharing that pic of you at 33? C’mon, the world needs to witness all that innocence hehe.
I’ll check out the challenge, thanks for the heads up!
Que hermoso, ahora entiendo todo, que intensos tiempos, abrazos, tkm
Igualmente, lo siento si soy un poco duro a veces pero es parte de este mismo proceso. Te abrazo también 🌈
Yes! Not just people, as you know, but all that surrounds you.
How do I practice self-love? Not through actions. I'm not sure if that is the advisable, but what I've been working on is acceptance, on easing and ending the judgement and badgering of myself to act differently. I think that's the beginning. So I tell myself "I love you", even when I'm smoking a cigarette, or bingeing on Netflix instead of writing, or whatever I'm doing that I don't really feel I 'should' be doing. I think the vibe towards oneself is most important. I suspect (hope?) that when I have that vibe on a regular basis, and I'm getting there, then it will flow into my actions more.
In the end, the vibe is all that will go with you everywhere, so I feel your approach is a good one. More acceptance, less judgement... sounds adequate and I wish you success in your practice of this.
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