I am so sorry for your loss @gentleshaid and I completely understand why you would not support my decision.
I was never in danger though, I took full responsibility for myself and my baby and if I felt either me or my baby, was I would have sought out a birth attendant. For me it is all about women being informed and making informed choices and having the support to do so. We are all different and everyone's decision should be respected. xx
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With experience come confidence. If my wife decides to do free birth after 2 children, I might support her (perhaps with medical professionals on the standby). It should be a collective decision between spouses, knowing that the husband only wants the best and the safest route. If something goes wrong, the trauma it will cost the husband and other family members should also be considered.