Kids are born in a very fragile form to the point where they need a great deal of care until they are old enough to think for themselves, make their own decisions, and even be accountable for the outcome of their decisions. If you've been around a newborn kid, you will see that it's self-evident that those little angels need 100% care.
To be fair, even folks who are in their forties and are lucky enough to have either parent alive still get some benefits from that parent-child relationship. Despite all the experience I've gained so far, I still work with the lessons I learned from my parents. A huge part of the moral values that punctuate each stage of my growth and development can be traced to the life lessons I learned from my parents.
So, I know for a fact that the traits that are possessed by parents play a big role in highlighting how effective they will be when playing their parenting role. The list of those traits can go as far as you want, but I will be highlighting 3 of those in this post.
They are;
1. You have to be Caring.
Parenting is a role that calls for a great act of care towards your kids. It starts way before you even bring kids into this world. The moment you decide that you want to have kids, it would be left for you to be sure that you are bringing them into a space that's safe for them to grow, develop, and thrive.
The moment they are born, the call for care becomes more self-evident. If you have a baby, you can't afford to just make plans without having their needs at the top of your priority. You need to plan for their meal, take care of their hygiene, and make sure that each stage of their growth and development is met properly.
2. Willingness to be Responsible.
I believe everyone is capable of being responsible. That capability comes from being aware of what's right and what's wrong. However, a lot of people choose to live and act irresponsibly. Imagine what kids would learn when they are raised in a home that's run by irresponsible parents.
I for one want to associate with people who are responsible and I know that we will have more responsible folks in society if there are more responsible parents. So, the willingness to act and live a responsible lifestyle is something that should be a part of anyone interested in taking up the role of parenting. Do it for you, for the kids and for the society at large.
3. Disagreeableness.
Do you know what's common among infants? Whenever they want anything, they ask for it and they want you to provide it IMMEDIATELY, no matter what, and at all costs. That's the attitude that's very visible in kids even before they are old enough to stand on their feet.
As a parent, are you going to bow to all they claim to be their needs? That would be one heck of a mistake to make. And, a lot of parents are agreeable to a fault when their kids are involved. They end up saying YES to all the kids ask for till they end up raising a kid who's (I'm searching for a "nice word") narcissistic. They will also grow to hate you for being a YES Dad or Mum to everything they asked for.
So, just be ready to say NO and mean it, whenever there's a need to do so. You have to be that disagreeable if you want to raise kids that will be proud to have you as a parent.
Thanks For Not Missing Any Full-stop or Comma.
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The day my hairdresser's 7 years old son asked her to give him money for biscuits before he will run errands for her, I almost ran mad.
I was boiling inside because my hairdresser could not exact any form of authority over the child as he practically ignored her and went to play
My daughter was watching the whole thing and when my hairdresser went on the brief errand herself, I told my daughter, you see this nonsense that boy just did to his mommy?
She nodded yes, I told her don't ever think of copying it, because you know me.
She said Ok mommy.
Parenting gets really frustrating when you are doing your best, then there's another parent raising societal problem and moral decadence.
In all we can't really get everyone to act in a certain type of way, we can only work on how we choose to respond.
#dreemerforlife
After everything I've seen about the mistake and level of naive tolerance Parents display when raising kids, I've got to say that I'm all-in with your parenting approach.
Children are meant to be loved and cared for. Parents need to realize that saying NO to some of their demands is also a way to show love and care to the kids. The same goes for stamping your authority as someone who has a duty of care over the kid.
Like you said, all we can do is to be sure we will do our parenting role well. That way, it will be easier for our kids to stick with what's right when they start mingling with the wider society.
I think the hard part about me when I become a parent is me saying no. I really will find it hard to look into my baby’s cute eyes and say no especially if she cries and follows me.
#dreemerforlife
Haha... This is really understandable. Parents, especially mothers who are new to childbirth, struggle to say No to their kids. Haha.
It's all a learning experience though. There comes a moment when No has to be said.
It isn't good to say yes to everything as a parent, that's one thing my dad didn't do. He showed us love , but scolded us when we do the wrong thing. Life in a Nigerian home.
Exactly. Parents need to also be capable of saying NO to their kids when there is a need to do so. Kids need to know that there is a limit to what they are allowed to do or have.
That's true..it even cuts across friendships you don't have to say yes to everything. So learning to say NO is very important
Parents need to show tough love if they really want to develop their kids having qualities of resilience, patience, responsibility, perseverance and many more.
I have seen parents who always bow to their kids thinking that they are showing love. On the contrary they are destructing their lives
Thanks for sharing you wise thoughts with us.
Thanks so much for bringing this thought-provoking topics. Each of the question were appealing and I'm glad I decided to dive into this particular one.
Parenting is not an easy thing. Learning to say NO to kids is also a big part of that learning experience.
!LOLZ. And learning to have a balance between yes and no is yet another big part. Tough job, haaaah
True. It almost seems like a balance is needed in all areas of life.
In deed
I think for me, the ability to always be caring even before having your kids is very essential, as you will need bucket loads of care to be a parent to your children. An interesting read. Dropped in from Dreemport.
#dreemmerforlife
That's true. Being caring is very important. It's a trait that's needed by everyone but parents need that in a special way because it will be almost impossible for them to raise kids properly without being caring.
Absolutely.
Sometimes when I really look at the responsibilities those parents pay, I am afraid of the responsibility that lies ahead of me as a parents
It's not easy oooo. While parenting is already a big deal on it's own, the first challenge that every person has to go through is to get into marriage with a partner that's worth being married to.
Once that's done nicely, it becomes easier to train kids.
Raising kids is really a very technical thing to do
I love those points you mentioned, u struck a balance and that is what is necessary
True. Being a parent isn't an easy call. However, anyone that decides to take on that role has to be ready to do if right.
It could be an interesting adventure for parents that prepare themselves for everything that comes with the role.
Yea, totally agree bro
May God help our parents
Thanks